Thursday, April 24, 2003

Corn Fed? Clearly. But Some Hand Spankin’ Is Still In Order

So did y’all watch the Dixie Chicks last night on Nightline? Natalie was looking decent, (thinner perhaps?) save for the excess mascara and of course the sisters Maguire were looking as good as they always do.

It was about what everyone expected. They kind of apologized, tears were shed, This Can Only Make Us Stronger comments were made. But the whole thing had a very contrived and staged feel. It felt like one big “Well, I’m sorry you feel that way”.

Natalie seemed to showing signs of extreme guilt throughout the interview. Guilt that she said something stupid and made a fool out of herself. Guilt that she put her “best friends” in a very uncomfortable position. Guilt that she cost the group as many as three million sales of their current album, a TV commercial and untold damage to their overall careers.

The telling scene was her ridiculous acting when Bin Laden’s name came up. This was clearly scripted by the Chick’s people in order for Nat to win some points with the Wal Mart crowd. Diane Sawyer asked her what she would like to do to Bin Laden and she said (after almost crying when before she said it)

I think everyone should give him a little bit of torture.

Give him a little bit of torture?

Doesn’t exactly make the average (as Mr. Burns might refer to them) Joe Lunchpail or Sally Housegoat get up and pump their fist in pride now does it? I wonder what the line was when it was written in their publicist’s office. And why would she start crying before she made a comment like that? That's supposed to be an angry comment, not a sad comment. Not something that would make you cry. Unless you are lying because nothing produces tears like guilt.

I had to laugh at some of the clips they played on the show. There was one priceless one from some talk radio show in the south:

I think they should take Natalie over to EYE-rack, strap her to a bomb and drop her over Baghdad.

As Natalie continued with her babbling guilt trip ("and I was like and he was like and they were like") the sisters made a few cogent points, although quoting Teddy Roosevelt was preachy and way over the top.

At one point, Diane Sawyer, a Southern Belle herself, said “I hear something not quite....how should I say this....whole-hearted.” That was the two-step they were attempting all night: to make it look like they were sorry, but then again to say that we have our free speech and isn’t this what America is about?

Natalie had one final chance to apologize to Bush right there on TV when Sawyer asked her if she had anything to say to him if he was watching.

There isn’t enough time in your show.

Which I took to mean she would go over a laundry list of her other fashionable grievances and not actually apologize.

It will be interesting to see what happens in a few weeks when the Chicks open their sold-out US tour in South Carolina. I'm pretty sure this will have blown over by then and they will be received warmly, but their long-term marketability has definitely taken a hit, especially with the core of the country market--the South.


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