Ever wondered what it would be like to have Goose Gossage and Lorenzo Lamas wish you a Merry Christmas?
Barring the ingestion of powerful mind altering drugs or profound depression, your answer is probably "no." Which makes me wonder exactly what's going on over at the North American Aerospace Defense Command.
The fine folks in charge of defending our skies also does the service of tracking the progress of Santa Claus on Christmas Eve for all the children of the world interested in such things. Which is great. Especially if you like flash animation of Santa buzzing aircraft carriers and nuclear submarines in war zones (and I do).
But this year, NORAD also presents video Celebrity Messages, in honor of NORAD's 50th year of tracking Old Saint Nick on Christmas Eve. And all I can say is, at least we can rest easy that the Pentagon isn't blowing its budget on talent fees.
Click on over and receive the finest of half-hearted, slightly confused greetings from the likes of Jose Canseco, Eric Roberts, Warren Moon, and Erik Estrada. (I knew it was difficult to find pro-US military celebrities in Hollywood, but this is ridiculous). And don't forget George Stroumboulopoulos. No, not George Stephanopoulos. This is George Stroumboulopoulos. An entirely different hairy celebrity Greek.
Next check out the best wishes from Brett Butt, Hayden Panettiere, Brie Larson, and Diamond Dave Somervile. Then, of course, hit Goolge, to find out exactly who Brett Butt, Hayden Panettiere, Brie Larson, and Diamond Dave Somervile are. Parents everywhere, and Donald Rumsfeld, will be relieved to hear that despite their names, none of them are adult film stars. Not yet, anyway.