Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Reflections Of A Dangerous Mind

I caught a little bit of the Hugh Hewitt show today. I say "a little bit" because here at my sprawling estate on the east side of Eagan the AM1280 signal tends to be a bit dicey at times. It's a problem I find quite curious as the transmitter, also located in Eagan, sits mere miles from my kitchen radio.

The first bit I did hear, albeit between incredibly loud bursts of static, was Hugh bemoaning the fact that NASA successfully crashed the Deep Impact probe into comet Tempel 1 over the weekend. Hugh, being a true man of science, fears we may have unleashed upon the universe some nature of imprisoned monster whose new found freedom will allow it to wreak unfettered havoc upon all of creation.

I'm sure Hugh would get along famously with Russian astrologer Marina Bai. She has sued NASA claiming the Deep Impact collision has somehow disturbed "the natural balance of forces in the universe" and is actively seeking damages for her "moral sufferings" because the success of the mission threatens to "deform her horoscope".

Compared to Hugh, this gal sounds like an astrophysics professor.

Later on in the show, Mr. Hewitt broached yet another subject that it seems he is grossly under-equipped to discuss...yes, I mean music. Now, this was well into the third hour, so maybe we can cut him some slack for being tired, but the man actually claimed that Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here" was nothing more that a rip-off of CC&R's "Who'll Stop the Rain?". Yeah, that's right...CC&R.

Now, leaving aside the absurdity that Floyd looked to John Fogerty and company for inspiration, what I found amusing was that Hugh continued to refer to CC&R for an entire segment with nary a word of correction from Generalissimo Duane and his studio full of lackeys. Does Hugh rule with such an iron fist that his radio companions live in fear that any attempt to correct his errors will be met with fiery rage? Could be. It could also be that they were just as amused as I and simply enjoyed hearing the self described musical genius make a fool of himself.

Then I got to thinking...given Hugh's astonishing lack of musical knowledge, what other outrageous comparisons might he be able to create? So, with apologies to the Nihilist crew, I give you:

Hugh Hewitt's Top 5 Musical Couplets

Peggy Lee's "It's A Good Day" and
"Beautiful Day" by U and 2

Megadeth's "Killing Is My Business...and Business is Good" and
"Takin' Care of Business" by BT and O

Gordon Lightfoot's "Carefree Highway" and
"Highway to Hell" by AC and DC

Motorhead's "Fight" and
"I Can't Fight This Feeling" by RE and O Speedwagon

Tool's "Third Eye" and
"Suite: Judy Blue Eyes" by Crosby and Stills and Nash and Young

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