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Tuesday, May 31, 2005
They're Fading Away Fast

Yesterday, my wife and I attended a Memorial Day service in St. Louis Park, the city (first ring 'burb really) that we call home. The event was organized by the local VFW post and included music performed by a community orchestra, speeches, and ceremonial salutes to honor the fallen. State Senator and possible gubernatorial candidate, Steve Kelley was among the politicians who spoke and he delivered a solid, if unspectacular effort, appropriate for the occasion. It was interesting to note that while the politicians managed to keep politics out of the event, a couple of the other speakers strayed over the line in this area.

It has been widely noted that we're rapidly losing the members of the "Greatest Generation" that fought in World War II. With their passing, we're losing their first-hand recollections of the events that changed history. We may be losing the only people who seem to be interested in organizing events like the one we attended yesterday as well.

Because, if my observations are any indication, Social Security's got nuthin' on the VFW when it comes to ticking demographic time bombs. If the VFW had a Doomsday Clock, it'd be at two minutes to midnight. Each and every VFW member who participated in the event, from the rifle squad that fired off a salute to the flag bearers who struggled to retire the colors to the poor bugler who feebly, but valiantly blew his way through "Taps", appeared to be World War II era vets. Some may have been veterans of the Korean War, but I don't believe any were younger than that.

Maybe the VFW post has members who served more recently (or even Vietnam vets) and they just didn't participate. Maybe there is a new guard waiting in the wings to fill the very big shoes of these veterans. But I fear that we may be seeing the last of the breed of men and women who year after year answer the call of duty to remember those who served (and those who serve today). If so, we won't just be losing the members of the Greatest Generation in body, we'll be losing their spirit as well. And that's a loss that will be felt by all the generations that have followed them.

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He Could Be The Guy Next Door

Peter e-mails to report confirmation of a brush with fame a long time in coming:

Our former neighbor acknowledges what we have assumed for years. We lived at Watergate At Landmark (307 Yoakum Parkway) in the west end of Alexandria, VA from 1978 to 89. Mark Felt lived two doors up the hall from us (on the 17th floor). He never implied that he was Deep Throat, but he was the acting deputy director of the FBI during the Watergate break-in (not related to the name of our large condo in Alexandria). As I remember, L. Patrick Gray was the acting FBI director at that time. Mark was typical of tens of thousands of faceless bureaucrats in Washington, DC, he was faceless and would go without notice as anyone of importance.

Here's the story from MSNBC:

W. Mark Felt, who retired from the FBI after rising to its second most senior position, has identified himself as the "Deep Throat" source quoted by The Washington Post to break the Watergate scandal that led to President Nixon's resignation, Vanity Fair magazine said Tuesday.

"I'm the guy they used to call Deep Throat," he told John D. O'Connor, the author of Vanity Fair's exclusive that appears in its July issue.

Felt, now 91 and living in Santa Rosa, Calif., reportedly gave O'Connor permission to disclose his identity.






If It's The Tuesday After A Holiday Weekend In Minnesota?

...it must be one of the most gorgeous days of the year. Just in time for us to plod our way back into the salt mines, that cruel hag Mother Nature "blesses" us with an absolutely frickin' beautiful day weather-wise. Friday failed to live up to expectations (especially for those of us who took the day off). Saturday suffered from cloudy skies and temperatures far below average. Sunday satisfied our longing for sunlight with an altogether too short promise of summer climes. Monday moderated our grumbling somewhat with decent conditions. But today, today is the kind of day that we live (and suffer) for here in these parts.

Today is an almost perfect early-summer day. And, although the calendar may not yet mark it as such, it is now summer in Minnesota. Because if this Gloomy Weather Gus says it's summer, you better believe that it indeed is.





The Canary Sings

Word is that this post has ruffled a few feathers among Governor Tim Pawlenty's faithful followers. And well it should. If Pawlenty is losing the support of people like Margaret, it does not bode well for his political future:

Which brings me to my final point. As much fun as it has been to read about "our Tim" as Presidential material in the national media, I confess that lately I have found it kind of scary. How can a guy who can't stand up to Dean Johnson stand up to terrorists? How can an executive whose main interaction with the legislature is to call people names and use his veto power, work with Congress? When I look at his administration, I don't see a Karen Hughes or a Karl Rove. With a few isolated exceptions, I see the B-Team.

It might be time to pump some fresh air (and new blood) into the mineshaft.





Saturday, May 28, 2005
Glacial Pace In The Information Age

The contest between the Northern Alliance Radio Network and Hugh Hewitt to see who could get their new site design completed sooner is over. And I'm proud to say that we kicked Hugh's butt.

Yes, it's only taken us about six months to redesign the NARN site, while Hugh's promised "new look" still is likely nowhere near completion. Boston had the "Big Dig." Hugh has his "Slog Blog." Anyway, you can check out the new NARN site here. If you have any comments or suggestions, drop us a line and we'll update the site as appropriate. Look for those changes to be complete sometime in early 2006.

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Look for the Union Label (Over Their Mouths)

As blog readers are probably aware (and non blog readers probably are not), Linda Foley, the president of the Newspaper Guild, has been making claims about the US military intentionally targeting and murdering journalists. Yes, the Newspaper Guild, the journalists' professional union, and their leader is making the same incendiary charges that got Eason Jordan torched at CNN.

Thomas Lipscomb of the Chicago Sun-Times has been diligently calling for a truth reconciliation in the matter. And he's been equally dismayed by his colleagues' silence in questioning Foley as by her specious claims in the first place. His latest plea to break the relative media blackout on this story was published in Editor and Publisher. It included the lonely roll call of those overcoming their conflict of interest to speak truth to power:

To date, not a single pundit, editorial writer, or newspaper ran anything, with the exception of the Chicago Sun-Times story I wrote, a St. Paul Pioneer Press column by Mark Yost, and a Washington Times column item.

Congratulations to our man Yost and the Pioneer Press for once again providing a perspective on the news which would have been happily buried by the rest of the MSM in this town.





Friday, May 27, 2005

They Don't Like It Here

It's been a tough week for Minnesota among the imported paid opinion commentariat. First the Bard of Tangletown (by way of Fargo), the great James Lileks, threatens to leave us because our weather sucks. (With the local forecast for the Memorial Day weekend I fear he may have already booked passage to Tucson.)

Now City Pages blogger Michael Tortorello is ripping us because we talk funny. I see that he is not one of us either. His tone and the olive oil seeping from his last name implies he's from out East somewhere. (And I don't mean the East Side, although he might fit right in at Yarusso's.)

Tortorello has managed to tolerate living among us for 14 years, but that's not nearly enough time to get whichever spaghetti bending hell hole he hails from out of his system, as this decidedly un-Minnesotan review of how we sound demonstrates:

The accent ... it is either charmless or monstrous. The reason no one in Minnesota has ever eaten a good bagel is because the word itself does not exist. (I have no idea how to format a schwa with this blog software, but I can say definitively that "beggl" is not acceptable.) I suspect the reason Minnesotans, alone among Americans, picked Mondale over Reagan owes to the fact they couldn't pronounce the Gipper's name. (It's more like "Raygun" than "reggn" or "raggn"--where the "a" sound rhymes with "rat." This pronunciation phenomenon is a variant on what linguists term the "northern shift.")

Not sure who he's been talking to about Ronnie Raygun (around the watercooler the CP, I'm just happy to hear he's referred to by something other than "that senile, warmongering Bonzo bedding B-actor!"). But in my semantic circles, you're about as likely to here "Reeg-in" as "Raggn" in reference to the great man. Luckily we now have a President who's name we can all pronounce correctly together: BUSH. You see, that man really is a uniter, not a divider.

Tortorello does do us the service of pointing to University of Wisconsin professor Bert Vaux's survey of dialects, showing the regional distribution of various terms and pronunciations. It's fascinating stuff, finding out exactly where the tectonic plates are for the pronunciation of "mayonnaise" or how we refer to glancing at someone in a lustful way (Minnesotans tend to be "oglers" rather than "ooglers").

This does open my eyes to the remote possibility there may be other places just as good as, if not better than, here. For example this map shows the distribution of terms for drive through liquor stores.

There are places with drive through liquor stores? Up until now I thought that was reserved for heaven.





Memorial Day Movie Pick

You can't go wrong this weekend with the documentary Return With Honor (1999):

RETURN WITH HONOR tells the powerful, moving story of American pilots shot down over North Vietnam and their challenge to survive with honor as POW's. A tribute to heroism, endurance, and brotherhood under duress, the film recalls the transformation from top-gun aviators to captives. Told in their words, rich with survivor humor, and complete with North Vietnamese archival footage, the film is a universal story of honor and duty.





Thursday, May 26, 2005

Tears of a Clown

I'm not sure why, but Senator George Voinovich is taking the nomination of an Ambassador to the United Nations very, VERY personally:

Ohio Republican George Voinovich came close to tears as he implored fellow senators yesterday to think hard before voting to approve John Bolton as UN ambassador.

Does this guy have an autographed picture of U Thant in a heart shaped frame on his desk or something? Maybe stock in one of Kojo Anan's business ventures? Or does it have something to do with a US Senator just not getting his way and stomping his little feet and holding his breath isn't a part of the sacred Senate rules (yet). Either way, I'm sure on beautiful this day a Backstreet Boy is laughing.

Voinovich, get a hold of yourself man! You're supposed to be a dignified member of the worlds greatest deliberative body. And now you're blubbering over the fact that a majority of your distinguished colleagues may approve the promotion of a civil servant - to the world's worst deliberative body. Is this any example to set for the fine folks from North Korea and Sao Tome and Principe?

Two quotes from the Godfather would seem to apply:

Now you listen to me, you smooth talking son-of-a-bitch. Let me lay it on the line for you and your boss, whoever he is. [Harry Reid] will never get that rejection. I don't care how many dago guinea wop greaseball goombahs come out of the woodwork.

Oops, wrong one (although I appreciate the veiled reference to John Corzine). I meant these two:

Sonny: You're taking this very personal. ... this is business and this man is taking it very personal.

Don Coreleone: You can act like a man! What's the matter with you. Is this how you turned out? A Hollywood fannuchio that cries like a woman. [Don Corleone imitates him sobbing]

Maybe the real Godfather (Karl Rove) can call Voinovich and deliver this message personally. Failing that, I nominate the Misanthropic Frat Boy.





Sinking Standards At The Strib

Geez, these days the Strib will publish a letter to the editor from just about any nutjob who can string three words together, won't they? Check out the one called "Demonizing the other side" from today's paper (at the bottom of the page).

(Via three who KARe)




Please, Oh Please...

MPR- Fundraising letter indicates Hatch has eye on Pawlenty's job:

Attorney General Mike Hatch has taken another step toward running for governor in 2006. Hatch sent a fundraising letter to DFL contributors, asking them to help him finance a gubernatorial campaign.

< Mr. Burn's Voice >

Excellent.

< /Mr. Burn's Voice >

This would almost be as good for the local right-wing noise machine as having Al Franken run for the Senate.

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That Is Just Scary

I was laying around this weekend watching the Twins and whilst flipping came across the classic movie Mrs. Doubtfire on cable. I watched for a few minutes and laughed a few times. Then it hit me. I recognized Mrs. Doubtfire from somewhere. In fact I had seen her mug that very morning in the Star Tribune.

Nick Freaking Coleman is Mrs. Doubtfire!

Mrs. Doubtfire

And...

Nick

Again...

Mrs. Doubtfire

And...

Nick

I know he knows stuff and all, but who knew the guy was so versatile.





Every Face Needs A Nose

Apparently, there's this Phil E. Buster fellow lurking about the U.S. Senate chambers lately. The Democrats want to hear him speak and the Republicans think he's a complete and total wanker. He was never elected to actually serve in any official capacity and, in fact, the American people have been growing less and less enamored with the folks he supposedly speaks for these past several years.

Now, I understand that some big agreement has been reached that will allow Mr. Buster to mingle amongst our elected representatives just as long as he stands there quietly, doesn't make too much of a fuss when the grown ups are talking and stays the hell away from Sen. Kennedy's secret hooch cache.

I guess that's all fine and good for the time being...he bit his tongue today as the folks in the Senate actually sat down and did their job for a change. I do fear, however, that some day soon, Phil's buddies are going to call upon the old guy to stand up and make a whole lot of noise just when some mighty important legislatin' needs to be done.

If that happens, we need some one with the guts to go Gillooly on this guy's ass...and Senator Rick (don't call him Shane) Stantorum seems to be just the man for the job. God knows that this Frist fellow ain't acting like he's up to the task.

Having said that, it's hardly time to self implode. I think some of my friends in the New Media (wink, wink, nudge, nudge to the Nickster) need to chill out just a tad, wait until the cloud from this most recent dust-up settles a bit and have an ounce of faith in the party that put us where we are today.

You don't have to donate anymore, but let's try not to obliterate our present position with pointless intra-party sniping and backbiting just yet.

The true test is yet to come.





Wednesday, May 25, 2005

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

Well, you can, but it isn't easy. Check out Tim Blair's Quote quiz which challenges you to:

Pick the genuine screaming leftie moonbat quote from the two fake screaming leftie moonbat quotes in these 20 batches of screaming leftie moonbatism!

Here's a sample:

10 a) "The fundamentalist Zionist lobby controls politics and the media in the US and Australia."

b) "Jews have all the money, and if you've got the money, you've got the power."

c) "A racial purity test should be applied to all prospective media owners in Australia."


Blair thoughtfully provides the answers, including the source of the quote. In this case it's:

10 a Online maverick Margo Kingston, 2004

A woman of many titles that Margo is. Try your luck at all twenty of Blair's quotable questions.




All I Am Saying Is Give Him A Chance

Unlike many of my conservative brethren, I'm not apoplectic over Monday's filibuster deal. At this point, I think it's too early to pass final judgment on it. At first blush it appears to be a defeat, but, depending on how things shake out down the road, it could prove to be a positive for the GOP. While I certainly don't believe that the deal is a victory for Bush, I don't think that it's going to hurt him either. And, as the impact of the compromise starts to sink in (and as "out of the mainstream radicals" like Owens, Brown, and Pryor are confirmed), I think we're going to see more liberals react like this.

The big winners in the compromise are those whose names are being mentioned as possibilities for the GOP ticket in '08. Clearly, this deal spells the end of John McCain's presidential ambitions. (At least as a Republican. Last night, Hugh Hewitt was speculating on his talk show that McCain could pull a "Perot" and run as a third party candidate, which more than likely would ensure that a Democrat (Hillary?) would win the White House.) All the flirting, back slapping, and cheerleading for McCain by the likes of Chris Matthews won't help the Arizona Senator get back in the good graces of the GOP faithful now.

Bill Frist is also done. Weak leadership, vacillation, and indecisiveness don't look good on the resume when applying to be the CIC. Especially, when such qualities are on display for the whole country to see. The fact that the deal was made is not Bill Frist's fault. The fact that there existed an environment where such a deal could be reached is.

You also have to think that this doesn't help Chuck Hagel either. Even though he wasn't directly part of the compromise, when the Republican primary votes look back on these events, they'll likely connect Hagel (almost as much of a "maverick" and media whore as McCain) with those who stood on the podium with Robert Byrd.

For the rest of the field, the damage done to these three by the compromise certainly brightens their hopes for '08. Assuming that Rice, Jeb Bush, and Cheney don't run this means that Romney, Allen, Thune (Hugh's new dark horse), Owens, Sanford, Pawlenty, Pataki, Barbour, Santorum, Huckabee, Gingrich (Saint Paul's man), and Rudy Giuliani were all probably sporting sly grins on Monday night (assuming of course that they all have in interest in running in '08 and are capable of guile).

Last week, there was talk around these parts about the prospects of Pawlenty taking a run at the top spot, especially with the now controversial reception for bloggers at the Governor's mansion in St. Paul.. It was also a week that saw Rudy Giuliani come to town and speak at a Center for the American Experiment dinner. I was lucky enough to be able to attend both events and so had an opportunity to compare two of the men said to be in the mix to succeed George W. Bush.

In my opinion, Giuliani is much closer to having what it takes than Pawlenty does. Pawlenty is quite good at coming across as a down-to-earth, honest, common sense kind of guy who gets stuff done. This has served him well in Minnesota politics and helps explain why his popularity has not really been dinged, despite some rough political patches of late. But these are not necessarily the kind of qualities that work on the national stage. People are pleased with Pawlenty, but not many are passionate about him. I think that in order to emerge out of a crowded field of contenders, and to have a good chance of winning the whole thing, you need to inspire passion in your supporters.

Giuliani can do this. He's a gifted speaker and has a great story to tell. It's much more than just 9/11 too. It's about taking on the entrenched bureaucracy of New York City, reforming the city's institutions, and reversing the decline that the city was in. And Giuliani tells it with passion and conviction. He also has a presence. It's hard to put your finger on it exactly, but you see him and you think, "He could be the President" (at least I did). I don't feel this with Pawlenty (at least not yet).

This is not to say that I'm going to be in my garage this weekend spray painting "Rudy" signs in anticipation of the 2008 Republican National Convention. It's far too early for me to pick a horse in this race, although South Carolina's Mark Sanford did catch my attention already. But last Thursday was the first time that I've seen Giuliani speak live and I was impressed by what I saw and heard.

What is a little distressing to me is how ready and willing a number of Republicans are to write Giuliani off. After the speech, I talked to several people about Giuliani's prospects in 2008 and the reaction was almost universally negative. "He'll never get through the primaries." "Too soft on social issues." "I could never vote for someone who isn't pro-life."

Having been around GOP politics for some time, I recognize these sentiments and understand them. However, I think that Republicans eager to throw Giuliani overboard already do so at their own (and the party's) peril. Yes, he's got a divorce (and a messy one at that) under his belt. Yes, he's not as conservative on social issues as many Republicans would like. And yes, he isn't pro-life. But ask yourself what exactly has been accomplished in the fight against legalized abortion in the four plus terms of pro-life Presidents since Roe vs. Wade was handed down. Restrictions on partial-birth abortions, limits to federal funding, and parental notification aside, we're not exactly talking about much of a rollback here, are we?

And consider what kind of judges Giuliani would appoint. The real problem with Roe vs. Wade isn't pro-life vs. pro-choice, it's that the decision took the abortion issue out of the hands of the states, where it rightfully belongs. I'm only speculating here, because I know nothing of Giuliani's legal philosophy, but I have a hunch that it's probable that he would favor judges likely to overturn Roe vs. Wade on these grounds. This is a topic that obviously deserves further consideration, but it's at least worthy of discussion instead of simply slamming the door and dismissing Giuliani out of hand because he's not pro-life.

It's also a little inconsistent for conservatives, who just got done hectoring libertarians that they had to vote for Bush because the War was the overriding issue of the day (I know because I was one of those doing the hectoring), to once again go back to an absolutist position that it's all about abortion. Call me crazy, but I'm pretty sure that the GWOT ain't going be wrapped up when 2008 rolls around, and having a guy like Giuliani to continue its successful prosecution seems like a desirable option.

Again, I'm not on the Giuliani bandwagon yet. There's a lot more I need to know about his positions and, at this point, we don't even know who else may be in the hunt. But I do know that the GOP is going to need a strong candidate in 2008, with at least some appeal to moderate voters. We're not gonna be running against John Kerry or Al Gore again (sigh). Take a good hard look at the now slightly narrowed GOP field and tell me who you think is going to be the kind of candidate with a realistic shot of preventing a Clinton sequel. I'm not saying that Giuliani is definitely that candidate. I'm am saying that we should at least give him a chance.

UPDATE: Doug at Bogus Gold has a good post with more on Giuliani and conservatives.

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More Pods In Place

We would like to extend a warm welcome to Michael J. Anderson, proprietor of the newly launched blog Tativille. Another right-of-center blog getting into the game is hardly breaking news, but Michael's bio is anything but run of the mill:

I am a Minnesota native (from Mark Kennedy's home town of Watertown... a few houses away, actually) who currently lives in Lower Manhattan. I have an M.A. in Cinema Studies from NYU's Tisch School of the Arts and a B.A. in European Studies from Hillsdale College. So I did my undergrad work at arguably the country's most conservative institution and my grad work at one its most liberal ones. My bent is right-of-center, but I am interested in a number of areas not often associated with the right.

Let's hope that Michael's post on the Democrats and free trade is a portent of what we can expect in the future:

Which leads us back to the quandary that the Democratic party finds itself in today. First, let's be clear about something: many on the Left do not believe that wealth can be created, but rather that it is a zero-sum matter. Hence, the existence of class warfare in political rhetoric and the continued counter-intuitive degradations against Reaganomics. Moreover, this basic belief in what wealth is and how its created informs everything from the advocacy of Free Trade coffee to the current well-intentioned movement to eradicate poverty: wealth needs to be transferred because it can't be created -- never mind any historical evidence to the contrary. This is the basic supposition of the MoveOn left.

Tativille joins reelcobra as right-of-center blogs run by former Minnesotans in areas that you wouldn't necessarily expect to find them: Lower Manhattan and Hollywood.





Tuesday, May 24, 2005
I Can Be Very Litigious

From today's Strib...

Lizz Winstead sues Air America radio network
May 25, 2005 WINSTEAD0525
Comedian-turned-radio-host Lizz Winstead filed a lawsuit in New York this week against her former employer, the liberal radio network Air America.

Winstead, a Minnesota native who was one of the first hires made by the network, claims she is owed $200,000 for on-air work, $14,423 in unused vacation time and $83,333 in severance pay. She was fired in March as co-host of Air America's show "Unfiltered," which has since been replaced by "The Jerry Springer Show."

"It's the sad old story of someone devoting 16-hour days to build an exciting, new venture -- and she's out the door without ... what she's promised," her attorney, Edward Hernstadt, told the New York-based newspaper Newsday.

Air America told the paper it wouldn't comment on pending litigation.

Deborah Caulfield Rybak


$200 g's? Not bad. Problem is you actually have to collect it, which doesn't sound like it's very easy. I'd hate to have to say that they are replacing me with a Jerry Springer re-run. Ouch.

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A Lazy-Media Label Separated At Birth?

James Garner playing the lead role in a TV Western and....

Tom Cruise playing the lead role in a military movie and...

John McCain playing the lead role in a political compromise?

Here's a little help from Thesaurus.com:

Main Entry: maverick
Part of Speech: noun
Definition: radical
Synonyms: bohemian, dissenter, extremist, malcontent, nonconformist, radical
Antonyms: conformist
Source: Roget's New Millennium Thesaurus, First Edition (v 1.1.1)
Copyright © 2005 by Lexico Publishing Group, LLC. All rights reserved.


I think malcontent works pretty well in McCain's case.

Frist: You and Hagel really are cowboys.

McCain: What's your problem, Frist?

Frist: You're everyone's problem. That's because every time you go out on the floor, you're disloyal. I don't like you because you're dangerous.

McCain: That's right! Doc...man. I am dangerous.

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The sunny side we also may view

Rick at Stones Cry Out sees the fillibuster compromise as a " Brilliant Political Move" by the GOP. Meanwhile, Sisyphus at Nihilist in Golf Pants also chooses to remain upbeat with his list of Top 11 Things the Republicans Get in Exchange for Surrendering on Judges. That sort of positive outlook is to be much admired. It will help us ev'ry day, it will brighten all the way.





Monday, May 23, 2005
Peace In Our Time

Who is the biggest winner in the Great Filibuster Compromise of Aught Five?
Senate Democrats
John McCain
Bill Frist
All other possible GOP candidates for President in '08

  
Free polls from Pollhost.com

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Playing Politics With Education

Cheri e-mails on my post last Friday concerning the struggles of Parents for Truth in Education in Colorado:

Regarding your post on teachers' union activities -

Take a look at this report - it shows how, across the country, taxpayer dollars are being misused for political advocacy. HF 1948 was introduced in the MN House this session as a result of this report. (Unfortunately, there was no companion bill in the Senate so it may go nowhere this session.)


Here is a just a small sample from the report itself:

A number of incidents occurred in Minnesota during the 2004 campaign cycle that highlight the importance of clear policies regarding the ethical issues of using publicly funded resources or school children to promote political causes:

* In Lakeville (ISD 194), the teachers' union sued the district in an attempt to force the use of teachers' mailboxes for the distribution of material endorsing John Kerry for president.

* Controversy swelled over the opportunity for high school bands in both Lakeville (ISD 194) and Robbinsdale (ISD 281) to perform during a presidential campaign visit.

* In North St. Paul-Maplewood-Oakdale (ISD 622), fliers advertising a political fundraiser for a state House candidate were sent home in the backpacks of third graders.

* Anecdotal stories of teachers expressing their political views in the classroom abounded, culminating with a letter to the editor by a seventeen-year-old student from Woodbury (ISD 833) decrying what she saw as political advocacy by teachers.

These issues are not isolated to Minnesota. Similar examples can be found across the country.






It's A Duck

Still wondering whether Governor Pawlenty's proposal to tack a seventy-five cent a pack "fee" on cigarette's is a tax or not? Look no further than this editorial in today's Star Tribune:

Let not the best display of gubernatorial leadership Minnesota has yet seen from Gov. Tim Pawlenty be sullied by a fuss over semantics. If he's willing to collect an additional 75 cents on each pack of cigarettes sold in this state, and spend that money on health care and schools, he can call it "squatski" for all we care.

The Strib is positively giddy about the plan, which they see as just the first step:

By whatever name, the proposal is a positive step. Yes, it's two years overdue; it's burdened with too many unwise conditions, and it's undersized, compared with the state's needs. Nevertheless, Pawlenty has made a commendable move toward a better 2006-07 state budget than the one he proposed four months ago, and toward reasonable results from the 2005 Legislature. He finally displayed some of the flexibility Minnesotans expect from a talented man elected not to lead his party or posture for national office, but to govern this state. We're eager for more.

It's not big enough. It should have been done it earlier. And the Star Tribune editorial board is "eager" for more.

You better believe that this is a tax baby.





Sunday, May 22, 2005

America, F*** Yeah!

I picked up the Team America - World Police (Uncensored and Unrated Special Collector's Edition) DVD on Friday.

The good news? The movie is hilarious.

The bad news? I can't get the song "America, F*** Yeah" out of my head and it keeps coming up at the most inappropriate times, today at church for example.

Oh well. I guess freedom isn't free as they like to say. It's a buck oh five.





Saturday, May 21, 2005

Peace Train Sounding Louder

Members of the "religion of peace" made their voices heard yesterday in London as they gathered in front of the US embassy and called for more innocent Americans to be slaughtered.

Are you still looking for a reason why? Well here's a clue for you all:
There were threats of "another 9/11" from militants angry at reports of the desecration of the Koran by US troops in Iraq.
Any more of you morons want to claim that the countless missteps by the mainstream media don't play a role in fostering hatred towards the United States?

With that in mind, I'm sick to death of hearing how cramming the Koran down a toilet has somehow now become the crime of the century. We've got people constantly cramming my country and my religion and my way of life and my fellow countrymen down the freakin' crapper every damn day that I breathe...and I'm just supposed to live with it?

Then I have to read crap like this:
Former Guantanamo Bay detainee Martin Mubanga told the crowd he had seen a copy of the Koran "desecrated" during his time at Camp Delta.

He said: "This was one of the methods they used, throwing the Koran, my Koran, on the floor in my cell."
Well boo-freaking-hoo to you, Martin. Your "book of peace" was tossed on the floor...and I had to watch thousands of my countrymen die in an unprovoked attack that sent the entire world reeling into turmoil from which, almost four years later, we have not quite yet recovered. Yeah...that sounds about equal.

Pick that damn book off the floor, Martin, and flip to whichever page that calls for peace (if you can find it). Let's get busy makin' some harmony. That is, if you and yours could stop with the whole "kill the infidels" nonsense.

Personally...I'm not holding my breath.





Friday, May 20, 2005

Through The Looking Glass

Law Talking Guy: Mr. Elder, you've been the boy's friend for fifteen years. Do you really think he could be the leader of the local right-wing noise machine?

Elder: Well, not the leader, I mean... [looks over at Atomizer] [cries] Oh, it's true, it's true! All the pieces fit! [bawls]


And apparently our readers have pieced the puzzle together as well and correctly fingered Atomizer as the key link in the daisy chain of the local right-wing noise machine. In our recently completed poll, Atomizer finished ahead of the field by a comfortable margin with John Hinderaker and Sideshow Bob tying for second.

An interesting feature of the poll was the manner in which the results were distributed. When you graph it, there is a remarkable symmetry to the distribution. Further evidence of intelligent design? Or the just the latest example of the evil genius of Karl Rove?




Talk About Speaking Truth To Power

This year, the Center of the American Experiment celebrates its fifteenth anniversary and last night they did it up right at their 2005 Annual Dinner at the RiverCentre in Saint Paul. Rudy Giuliani was the key note speaker and the former mayor of New York City did not disappoint. I hope to have time for a more in-depth post on last night's event later, but for now let me note one of Rudy's most interesting revelations. During his stint as mayor, he challenged the city's most powerful unions in order to push the reforms needed to turn New York around. The police unions, the fire unions, the city workers unions, health care unions. You name 'em, he took 'em on and dragged them kicking and screaming along with his plans that revitalized a city previously thought to be on an irreversible decline.

All except one. Giuliani admitted that the one area that he was unable to make any real progress in New York City was education. This was the man who stared down drug dealers, Mafia bosses, and the hostile New York media. The man who pared back the New York City welfare rolls, dramatically reduced crime, and made the Big Apple livable again. The man who emerged unbowed, defiant, and resolute following the horrific attacks on 9/11. This man finally met his match when he went up against one of the most powerful, well organized, deeply entrenched organizations in the world. Rudy Giuliani could not overcome the resistance of the teachers unions.

But if there is to be any hope for reforming public education in the United States, these unions must not be allowed to continue to control the agenda. Their hegemony over public education must be ended and they must be held to account for their role in the decline of American educational standards and achievement.

A great way to take the first steps to making this happen is to support groups like Parents for Truth in Education:

We're two parents in the town of Fort Collins, Colorado. Next week we go head-to-head with the teachers unions in court, and we desperately need to get the word out about our cause.

We filed a legal complaint against our local union for violating election law last year. In our first hearing, the union's motion to dismiss was rejected and we managed to get the statewide Colorado Education Association and the local school district enjoined as co-defendants.

We go to trial next week. Our legal complaint states that the union illegally conducted blatant campaign operations during school hours and using school resources. Teachers even complained --in writing-- about the campaign demands on their time.

The local and state teachers unions, working through the schools, used district resources to recruit volunteers, organize meetings, and offer inducements to volunteers on behalf of Bob Bacon's campaign for State Senate. This was done using school resources during school hours by school employees.

We are seeking injunctive relief, meaning that our suit could re-write election law and force teachers unions to change how they do business in the future. This could be the little lawsuit that significantly alters the balance of power in Colorado politics.

We created Parents for Truth in Education, and we quickly put up a website at www.parentsfortruth.com so we can accept PayPal contributions. Without significant financial help, we will not be able cover our legal fees. We need money, and we need it immediately.


You can read more about their case here, here, and here.

This fight is taking place in Colorado, but it's more than a local issue. It's about the future of education in America. The future of the country itself.

Take the first step and help Parents for Truth in Education in their struggle against the power of the teachers unions. Let's win this one for Rudy.

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Connecting The Dots

A few of my cohorts have shared their thoughts regarding our attendance at Governor Pawlenty's Reception For The New Media this past Tuesday evening. None of them, however, adequately described the details of what really went on that night.

It was a truly magical evening that began with a rather informal gathering in the mansion's spacious but elegantly soft-spoken foyer. I must say here that First Lady Mary Pawlenty has really done an impressive job with the interior of the old Ventura place. One can only imagine what she could do with a canvas as big as The White House. Dare to dream....

The group chatted in the foyer, caught up a bit (most of us hadn't seen each other since the Kentucky Derby party over at Yostie's place) and were soon welcomed by some of the Governor's staff who, after introducing themselves, ushered us all into a basement room for what we were told would be a brief "media presentation".

As the lights dimmed, a large projection screen began to drop out of the ceiling at the end of the room...and the hush of anticipation filled the air. That silence was soon usurped by uproarious applause as the visage of local hero David Strom filled the screen. David's ten minute long taped message was passionate, inspirational and, at times, just plain brilliant. One of his biggest applause lines of the night was: "We need you bloggers to stay on message, stay on target and to keep ridin' those liberals' asses!" Great stuff.

Stromie's performance was followed by a very brief intermission and then the screen exploded with light once again. This time, the face that greeted the room made every last one of us snap silently to attention. It was none other than Karl Rove himself. His address kept us all in stunned reverence for nearly twenty minutes. I can't go into to the details here (as it would seriously compromise our mission) but Mr. Rove succinctly spelled out what we all need to do in the coming months and years to fulfill the President's far reaching goal to destroy the twin evils of godless terrorism abroad and progressive liberalism at home.

What I can say is that Mr. Rove did assuage our massive egos by mentioning most of our blogs by name. I swear that Doug nearly choked on his martini olive when he heard Bogus Gold mentioned not once, but twice.

As the projection screen was being retracted, Governor Pawlenty himself entered the room (to thunderous applause, of course) and gave us another brief but poignant pep talk on the importance of the New Media in today's world. He then invited us upstairs where we feasted on fresh salmon, lobster and wild game with all the free liquor, beer and wine we could swallow. Let me tell you, we bloggers can swallow a lot.

Pictures with the Governor (here, here, here and here) and more chit-chat followed.

Believe me, not one of us wanted that evening to end. We left, however, with a renewed sense of purpose and a feeling that our mission was clear. We have our marching orders...and march we shall.





Thursday, May 19, 2005

Rumors of MOB Activity in Stearns County

The inaugural outstate meeting of the Minnesota Organization of Bloggers will be held this Saturday in St. Cloud. King Banaian has all the details at SCSUScholars.

If you have been unable to attend previous MOB functions because of their Twin City-centric locations, this is your opportunity to fulfill your membership requirements.

I know that at least a few of the metro based MOBsters also are planning on attending, including the man who officially makes (and rumor has it can also break) MOB members, our own Saint Paul. Look for the guy wearing the pinky rings.





Such A Lovely Audience

I'm nearly finished reading a biography of P.G. Wodehouse aptly titled Wodehouse: A Life, by Robert McCrum. Wodehouse did not lead a fascinating life by any stretch of the imagination. His day to day existence was actually remarkably mundane, with changes in settings and events unfolding around him providing most of the real interest. Still, it is always enlightening to discover what kind of life noted writers have lived as well as their views on writing itself. Here's a classic from Wodehouse that I particularly enjoyed:

"I know those blank periods when the idea of writing just seems silly and you wonder why you ever started the thing...my trouble [is] a sort of scornful loathing for the reading public. One feels what's the use of strewing one's pearls for these swine?"




The Power To Change The World

Publius Pundit asks if Andijon was another Tiananmen? If you're not sure what he's talking about, you're not alone. Recent events in Uzbekistan have not gotten the attention they probably deserve. It's a difficult situation for the Bush administration and their oft professed support for democratic movements around the world. Publius Pundit hopes they make the right call:

Remember, freedom has the power to change the world. When the time comes, none of those issues will matter anymore. Unfaltering support for the values of democracy will bring America both the friends and security it needs throughout all regions of the world, quelling Islamofascism and the remnants of totalitarian communism where they hide. The war on terrorism can only be fought by conducting a war on tyranny. Stability can only be achieved when democratic governments held directly accountable to the people are instituted. Please, President Bush and Secretary Rice, keep this doctrine in mind when facing the challenges posed by the uprising in Andijon. Reform and regime change cannot be expected over night, but it should certainly be expected.

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Wednesday, May 18, 2005
In Saint Paul, They Love The Governor

Last night, we had the good fortune of being invited to a reception at the Governor's Mansion in St. Paul along with a number of other local bloggers and outstate talk radio hosts. The entire Northern Alliance of Blogs was on hand with the notable exception of James Lileks. Apparently he was too mainstream for this particular affair. Other prominent bloggers of note who attended the reception include the triumvirate from Kennedy v. The Machine (Gary, Doug and John), the two fine young gents from the Patriot Blog, and Jerry, who is an outpost of red in a blue district at the SD63 blog (he knows a thing or two about beer as well).

Not since the heyday of Tyrell Ventura had such an eclectic crew been invited inside the residence. For the record, we were much better behaved than Tyrell's cohorts and the taxpayers of Minnesota can rest assured that the dignity and integrity of the stately home (not to mention the rugs, furniture, and fine China) were not compromised in any way by our visit.

The highlight of course was the opportunity to chat with Governor Pawlenty and some of his staff. He proved to be an engaging, affable host who genuinely seemed to enjoy the opportunity to converse with members of the emerging "alternative" media. Or at least he did a damn good job pretending to.

Everyone has their own "pet" issues that they're passionate about and the Governor took the time to indulge us the opportunity to air our concerns on pressing issues of the day that we feel deserve special attention.

Here Governor Pawlenty and the Warrior Monk from SPITBULL shake hands after the Governor agrees to consider WM's request to call out the National Guard and wage brutal and uncompromising war against the insurgent squirrels who keep the WM awake at night.

JB Doubtless and his fiancé made the trip up from Rochester, which gave JB the chance to vividly demonstrate the horror of the recent Springsteen concert in St. Paul to Governor Pawlenty.

When my turn with the Guv came, I began by weighing in the on the possible economic implications for Minnesota if the Chinese government elects to float the renminbi, but that topic was evidently not capturing his imagination. He was obviously interested in more substantive discourse and so I elected to play the tried, but true Ralphie card.

Everybody loves Ralphie and the Governor proved just as susceptible to the little guy's charms. An unfortunate incident on the way to the gala had left Ralphie's head in the rather precarious position of no longer being connected to his body. But the Governor was able to see beyond Ralphie's physical limitations and discover the true spirit within him. It's clear to everyone who knows Ralphie that he's got a good head on (or off) his shoulders, and Governor Pawlenty was no exception.

While Ralphie appealed to his heart, I made a pitch to the Governor's head and asked that he rescind the title of Minnesota Commissioner of Hockey that he bestowed upon Hugh Hewitt a few years back. Governor Pawlenty found my arguments compelling and my logic that Hugh does not adequately represent the interests of hockey in Minnesota to be flawless. He promised to take care of this matter at his earliest available convenience and plans on personally delivering the news to Hugh on his show in the near future.

This may not be the beginning of the end of Hugh's spree of collecting meaningless, ill-deserved titles, but I believe that we can say with confidence that it is the end of the beginning. The rollback is underway.

For more on last night's festivities check out:

Captain's Quarters

Kennedy v. The Machine

Bogus Gold

and

Shot In The Dark

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Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Don't Lose Your Head Ralphie!

It's just Tim Pawlenty, Governor of Minnesota and possible future candidate for President of these United States. Tonight, Ralphie had a chance to get up close and personal with a guy who likes hockey almost as much as he does and Governor Pawlenty had a chance to get inside the head of the world's most famous bobble-head doll with an uncanny resemblance to a nationally syndicated talk radio host. The occasion was a special reception for bloggers and out-state (I should have clarified that earlier) talk radio folks at the Guv's pad in St. Paul. More details tomorrow as time allows.





It's Not Easy Being Green

It is always disturbing to be in agreement with a Green Party member on matters of public policy. And I think I find myself in that situation with regard to the garbage burner baseball stadium in downtown Minneapolis.

The two Greens on the Minneapolis City Council (yes, Greens aren't an amusing novelty in Minneapolis, they're the government), have come out against the ballpark:

A resolution introduced Friday would put the city on record against the plan. The council's Intergovernmental Relations Committee will consider the resolution at a meeting May 24. The council's two Green Party members, Natalie Johnson Lee and Dean Zimmermann, introduced the proposal.

Seeing Dean Zimmermann's name attached to this proposal makes me even more nervous. Recall, he's the fellow, while a member of a Marxist-Leninist cult, cited the following as models for a just society:

"We looked to Cuba, which had health care for everyone. We looked to China, which eradicated starvation. We thought we could transform our society and eliminate the chasm between the rich and the poor"

Nope, that cult was not the Minneapolis City Council, it was something called "O". But I suspect ol' Dean carries over many of these same warm and fuzzy feelings for brutal, socialist dictatorships into his new endeavor, governing the city of Minneapolis. And now me and Dean are in lockstep agreement on the baseball stadium.

Luckily, before scheduling a battery of psychological tests and a desperate review of my economic analysis and philosophical foundations, I read the rest of the article, which details the alternative path Zimmermann took to arrive at the same conclusion as I:

Zimmermann said he thinks the proposal is a great one in a great location, but he questions how it's funded.

OK, a baseball stadium next to a 1,000 ton per day garbage processing facility, "a great location," that's starting to sound like the Zimmermann we know and love. Then, the clincher:

"This is the most blatant example of corporate welfare that I've seen since George Bush invaded Iraq to fill the pockets of Halliburton," Zimmermann said.

Whhew, I feel much better now. He's still crazy after all these years. His position on the ballpark is merely a case of a stopped clock being right twice a day, or a blind nut finding a squirrel, or something. And knowing this nut will soon be paying $353 million for a garbage burner baseball stadium seems be rough justice, on some level. Minneapolis gets the government, the baseball stadiums, and sales taxes they deserve.





Mamas, Let Your Babies Grow Up To be Snipers

Tony Woodlief writes on the dreams of a dad at NRO:

I have to begin by acknowledging that the thought of her son becoming a Navy SEAL sniper fills my wife's heart with dread, as it probably would many mothers. She can't understand why I would encourage fate by giving voice to such an idea. But I nurture my dream nonetheless. Let's face it, the number of people around the world in need of a match-grade round between the eyes is on the increase, and you and I aren't up to the task. I'm proud to think of my son filling that niche in the job market.

He goes on to list the qualifications that he believes his son (all of one year old) possesses for that line of work. Well worth a read.





Monday, May 16, 2005

Twelve Hour Party People

Over the course of my involvement in politics I've attended a lot of conventions. Senate district conventions usually at local schools, congressional district conventions usually at hotels, and state conventions usually at venues like the Xcel Energy Center. Many a beautiful spring/summer day in Minnesota, have I wasted spent indoors dealing with the arcane machinations of the political party process. I've also helped organize and run a few of these events and know that it's a difficult, thankless task.

But in all my years of conventioneering, I've never heard of anything quite as fouled up as last Saturday's Minneapolis DFL get together. As Doug Grow reports:

The convention, which was to go about the business of endorsing a mayoral candidate, was to have begun at 10 a.m. Saturday.

Sounds simple enough. Endorse a mayoral candidate, dish out endorsements in a few other hotly contested races (park board, etc.), and go home. No problem, right?

But it wasn't until that time that the party leaders figured out they had a problem: There weren't as many seats as there were delegates.

After much fussing and feuding about who was going sit where (read Grow's column for all the gory details), the convention was officially called to order at around 11:30am. A little late but still plenty of time to take care of business, right?

Not for the Minneapolis DFLers. Apparently the voting for the mayoral endorsement did not start until 2:30pm. It ended after five ballots. And no endorsement:

Minneapolis DFLers went home late Saturday without endorsing a candidate in the mayoral contest between incumbent R.T. Rybak and his main challenger, Hennepin County Commissioner Peter McLaughlin.

I've been through a few of these endorsement battles myself and know that they're no picnic. You vote. Then you wait as candidates and their allies try their best to woo delegates and create the impression that they have the momentum. Then you get the results. And then you vote again. Lather rinse and repeat until one of the candidates hits the magic number.

It's not surprising that the Minneapolis DFLers had such a battle on their hands on Saturday. What is surprising is how long it took them to go through five ballots.

The convention ended after 12 hours.

Twelve hours, five ballots, and no endorsement? I know that you're urban Democrats and getting things done is not your strong suit, but c'mon how hard can this be?

I gotta think that one of the problems is just the sheer size of this circus.

A rainy, cold day brought about 1,900 delegates to the convention in the Augsburg College gym, more than double the previous record for attendance.

1,900 delegates? According to figures from the 2000 Census the population of Minneapolis proper (just the city, not the surrounding 'burbs) is 382,618, which means that you had a DFL delegate at Saturday's convention for every 201 residents of the city. Even if you assume, as some local talk radio hosts do, that anyone living in Minneapolis must be a Democrat, this still seems to be gross overrepresentation. By comparison, there were 2510 delegates at the 2004 Republican National Convention representin' the whole frickin' country.

Being a bit more selective might have also helped ensure that events were more orderly as well:

Heavy turnout meant a long delay in getting started and a messy, chaotic marathon of procedural challenges and frequent heckling.

Frequent heckling? Procedural challenges come with the territory at political conventions (I swear some people live for Roberts Rules of Order), but frequent heckling does not. Or at least it should not.

Saturday's DFL convention was indeed a true reflection of the party that rules Minneapolis. They planned it poorly, started it late, wasted incredible amounts of time bickering amongst themselves, and in the end accomplished nothing. Residents of the City of Lakes can rest easy knowing that the party that dominates their City Hall is about effective on the weekend as it during the work week.





Smells Like Government Spirit

Hey, good news out of Hennepin County. The proposed site for the new Twins baseball stadium doesn't stink - much.

From the front page of the Star Tribune, one of the most ardent supporters of using tax dollars for this multi hundred million dollar government subsidy, an article with the charming title (in the print edition): Taking a Good Stiff Whiff.

But after more than a year of daily monitoring, [Hennepin County Senior Environmentalist Jake Smith] and four other trained air smellers report that it's unlikely that aromas from the Hennepin Energy Recovery Center (HERC) will overpower the odor of hot dogs -- or bad pitching -- in any stadium next door.

Yes, the government of Hennepin County, those same folks who recently voted to give $353 million of tax revenue to the Minnesota Twins (while denying the request for voters to give approval via referendum) are also in charge of administering the study that seeks to prove there will be no adverse consequences for locating the ballpark right next to a facility which burns 1,000 TONS of solid waste PER DAY.

With that gem of a parcel of land selected, you can start to see why there isn't a private investor in the world who would sign on to this project. No, instead the force of government will be used to make us all investors in this field of dreams. And what are we going to buy for our money?

... [Smith] found the scent of solid waste distinguishable at only four sites, although one was close to where home plate may someday be.

Understand, the Star Tribune is reporting this, the official Hennepin County line, as good news. Fellow citizens, for your 353 extra large, you're getting a ballpark where a thousand tons of solid waste burning a few hundred yards away is "unlikely" to overpower the smell of hotdogs. At least at more than 4 sites, only one of which is near home plate. Where do I sign up for my personal (toilet) seat license?

Here's another way of relaying their message of "Don't Panic," at least until the bill passes the state legistlature and becomes law.

At opposite corners of the HERC property along 7th Street N. the panel detected incinerator odors for three straight days only once at each point.

That is reassuring news. Very few four game series will suffer the stench of blazing trash throughout every game. Sounds like a good reason to buy season tickets right there, the odds of at least some stink free baseball will be almost assured.

More good news, at this hand picked site, the smell of burning garbage is the least of our worries:

On his 3-mile walk-and-sniff Friday past 21 specific points on a route that rippled outward from HERC toward downtown and into the Warehouse District, Smith detected a lot of distinct smells: bus exhaust, sewer gas, blossoming plants, fish from a fish wholesaler.

Ah yes, the ambiance of the warehouse district in Minneapolis. Which may turn into a home field advantage, once the Twins get used to inhaling bus exhaust, fish, and sewer gas on a daily basis. Recalling those scrappy 1934 St. Louis Cardinals, maybe we can start calling the Twins "The Sewer Gas House Gang".

The absurdity of this story highlights the essential problem with government intervention in the private capital markets. Not only are they taking the people's money and redistributing it to support an entertainment option they would never freely choose on their own, the government picks a site that is a baseball atmosphere. One bordered by a garbage burner, an interstate highway, and a series of cement parking ramps. It's what you don't want, where you don't want it!

Only the government can get away with something like that. And under a one party (DFL) regime like Minneapolis/Hennepin County, that's business as usual. Business for which there will be no electoral consquences. What are the people of Minneapolis going to do, vote Republican? (Ha!) No, instead, their government will serve them garbage, tell them it's peanuts and crackerjack, and the local paper is more than happy to spoon feed it to us all.





Good For Saint Paul?

Stars aligning for a 'Prairie Home' movie:

Stargazers, get out your binoculars and your autograph books. This summer, the most high-wattage star power ever to convene in Minnesota for a single film will alight in St. Paul.

Legendary director Robert Altman will direct the film version of Garrison Keillor's "A Prairie Home Companion" at the Fitzgerald Theater in July, his production company confirmed Sunday. The big-name cast includes Meryl Streep, Lindsay Lohan, Woody Harrelson, Lily Tomlin and John C. Reilly, with more big names coming.

"As a longtime Keillor fan, I'm thrilled to be doing this project with him," Altman said Sunday. "I can't wait to begin."

Garrison Keillor wrote the as yet untitled movie's script, a comic fable about an iconic radio show that is suddenly canceled after 30 years on the air.


Rumor has it that an specially designed annex will be built to the Fitzgerald Theater before filming begins to house Keillor's ever expanding ego.





A Pope After My Own Heart

Hard not to like a Pontiff who enjoys a good beer:

Hat tips to The Paragraph Farmer and The A Saintly Salmagundi for digging up more specifics on the beer -- Malteser Weissbrau from Stuttgarter Hofbrau-- favored by our Teutonic Pontiff.

Malteser Weissbrau? Definitely going on my list of beers to rate.





Sunday, May 15, 2005

The Long And Winded Road

The Nihilist hipped me to this review of Springsteen's show this past week in Saint Paul.

Keeping true to form, reviewer John "Foghat" Bream let us know that it was a special group of patient, dedicated and apparently suffering fans who attended the all acoustic show:

Springsteen offered stripped-down, sometimes tuneless ballads and soft-as-a-whisper stories about desperation and desolation. It takes a committed crowd to appreciate and absorb such soft, contemplative material in a hockey arena, set up to half its usual capacity. And the 7,996 fans clearly appreciated the artfulness of the evening.

Tuneless ballads--sounds very entertaining. Desperation and desolation--if I wanted desperation and desolation, I'd hang out with Chris Riemenschneider (the Strib's other music reviewer) in Uptown.

Notice how he praises the crowd as "committed" because apparently a normal group of people swigging a few beers and looking for a good night of entertainment would have been out of luck. You really had to bare down in order to enjoy yourself watching Springsteen acoustically.

Artfulness. God help us when this phrase is thrown about in a music review. It's hard to decide who is filled with more self-importance, Springsteen, Bream or his die-hard group of lefty fans who were there for art.

And if you are a conservative and like Springsteen or even attended this show, you really need to wake up. The guy hates you and everything you stand for. Is that clear enough? Another quote from the piece:

This was Springsteen the troubadour, not the rocker, playing his second solo tour, his first since 1995-96. Unlike October, there weren't nonstop political plugs. He did make a couple of pointed remarks, slamming the president before singing the sarcastic "Part Man, Part Monkey" and calling for a "humane immigration policy" before "Matamoros Banks."

Part Man, Part Monkey is Springsteen's snotty take on creationism versus evolution including these lines:

Well did God make man in a breath of holy fire
Or did he crawl on up out of the muck and mire
Well the man on the street
Believes what the bible tells him so
But you can ask me mister because I know
Tell them soul-suckin' preachers to come on down and see
Part man part monkey, baby that's me


What is interesting about these lyrics is the patent elitism of his take on this issue. He says the man on the street is basically a simpleton who believes anything the bible says. I always thought Bruce spoke for this man on the street, the simpleton, the guy that puts in 8 hours a day, the backbone of the country, etc. Now he uses the man on the street to describe an unsophisticated hick who gets brain washed by soul-suckin' preachers. If only that guy would just listen to his social betters like Springsteen and understand we all came from apes!

And what night of art would be complete without vulgar references to anal sex? Luckily for the fans on hand in Saint Paul, Bruce did not dissapoint with his song Reno(which, btw, got his CD banned from Starbucks something I'm sure his lefty fans applauded):

She took off her stockings
I held 'em to my face
She had your ankles
I felt filled with grace

"Two hundred dollars straight in
Two-fifty up the ass" she smiled and said
She unbuckled my belt, pulled back her hair
And sat in front of me on the bed


Charming.

Like Bream said, art isn't always easy. If you are a true, deep thinking fan, you would have sang along as he described anal sex with a prostitute. And after shelling out 100 bucks for a night of torture, you would have known how it felt.





Friday, May 13, 2005
The Stem-Winder Sleeps Tonight

Even the best hitter strikes out sometimes. The best quarterback throws a pick. The best guard misses a lay up. The best goalie lets a dump in slip between his pads. The best golfer misses a two foot putt. And, once in a blue moon, the best trivia team misses a gimme.

Such was the case with the Fraters squad last night at Keegan's Irish Pub. We let an easy one slip through our fingers and it ended up costing us a chance to share in yet another trivia championship . One question made the difference between the joy of victory (and more importantly the joy of free drinks) and the agony of defeat (you haven't seen true agony until you've witnessed the Nihilist having to open his wallet to pay for a beer). One question that we had no business missing, yet inexplicably did.

A history question no less. On a matter that we are all at least moderately well versed. The query that tripped us about was,

"Who gave the longest speech in UN history in 1960?"

As soon as we heard the question, the possible answers started flying fast and furious both at the table and in our minds. Adlai Stevenson seemed like a good response until we realized that he did not become US Ambassador to the UN until 1961. U Thant was mentioned and I also thought that Dag Hammarskjold was a possibility. After further discussion we ruled out the Secretary Generals from the mix. We then went back to a name that had come early on and decided to go with it: Nikita Khrushchev. We figured maybe he did more than just pound his shoe at the UN. Maybe, just maybe he also tried to bore us as well as bury us.

It turned out that we had the wrong Commie. After the cards had been corrected and just as Marty "Wayne" Newton was about to read the correct answer, it hit Saint Paul like a thunderbolt:

Fidel Castro

Fidel F'in Castro. Of course it was Fidel Castro. In the last three months Saint Paul and I both had penned posts regarding the spectacular length of Castro's oratories. And yet last night, when we most needed to come up with that nugget of knowledge, it was nowhere to be found. The gods of trivia work in mysterious and sometimes cruel ways.

The evening was not a total loss. A night at Keegan's never is. We had the pleasure of meeting Ryan from ZERO TWO MIKE SOLDIER! (another MOB member in good standing). In addition to being a mil-blogger, substitute teacher, and jazz aficionado, Ryan also plays in a local ska band called The Secondhand Ska Kings. We're hoping that someday soon the band will be playing at Keegan's in the coveted Thursday night post-trivia time slot. Developing...

We were also able to take advantage of a great deal on Stella Artois beer. For three fitty you got a pint of Stella and a nice glass. You also had a chance to win a free beer if you got a chocolate coin with your glass and Saint Paul and Atomizer were both fortunate enough to do just that.

The Jameson gals were on hand as well, passing out free samples of their fine Irish Whiskey. Cheap beer, quality barware, and free whiskey definitely helped ease the pain of our trivia failure.

At the end of the evening things got even better as I was pleasantly surprised to be able to exit the parking ramp behind Keegan's without having to pay. Free parking baby. Truly one of life's simple yet very satisfying pleasures.

SAINT PAUL AMPLIFIES: Margaret Martin, of Our House blog and the diva of Taxpayers League Live! (9AM Saturday, AM1280 the Patriot) reminds us what trivia victory tastes like.

THE ELDER ECHOES: Very thoughtless of me to forget to salute those who bested us. Hail to the victors!

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Better Than Pulling A Double At BK

Parents, are you looking for a chance for your kids to earn a little extra money this summer as well as learn about one of the most pressing political issues of the day? Here's your chance. Tell little Johnny or Jane to sharpen up their pencils and minds to take a crack at this essay contest on Social Security reform sponsored by Americans for Prosperity.

Essays should be between 250 - 750 words. Please address some of these questions:

* Why does Social Security matter to you and your family?

* What will happen if nothing is done to fix Social Security's financial problems?

* What kind of Social Security system would you hope for in the future?

* What would you change about the current Social Security system?

* What is your view of the proper relationship between a citizen and the government? How does Social Security affect this?

Essay Prizes: There will be two divisions in our contest: the Senior Division will be for students in Grade 9 through 12, and the Junior Division for Grades 4 through 8. The following prizes will be awarded: Junior Division (Grade 4-8) Senior Division (Grade 9-12) First Prize: $250 First Prize: $250 Runner-Up: $100 Runner-Up: $100 Third Place: $50 Third Place: $50


Two fitty will buy a lot of rock candy kids.





Thursday, May 12, 2005

They'd Rather Be Hibernating

It's 12:30pm and the temperature is a balmy thirty-six degrees here in the Twin Cities today. And it's raining. A hard, cold rain that sucks the warmth right out of ya.

In a little less than half an hour my nephew will be taking the field at the National Sports Center in Blaine with the University of Montana lacrosse squad. The Grizzlies will be taking on the hated Johnnies from St. John's University in their opening game of the 2005 US Lacrosse Intercollegiate Associates National Championships.

There is no such thing as a rain out in lacrosse. The only way the game would be cancelled is if there was lightening, which appears unlikely.

You know, a day in the office doesn't sound bad at all any more.

UPDATE: Reports indicate that the Grizzlies mauled the Johnnies 13-8 to move on to the semifinals. We'll see ya tomorrow morning!





The Dream Realized

For the record, I saw NAACP Chairman Julian Bond on Saturday night, standing in front of Cafe Latte on Grand Ave. in St. Paul. He was amiably chatting with some old, short, white people. Proving, we can all get along. At least when there's Raspberry Triple Chocolate Torte in the immediate vicinity.
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You're Not Good Enough, You're Not Smart Enough, And...

The other night JB Doubtless and I were talking about the early rounds of "American Idol" and the delusions that so many of the contestants labor under in when it comes to their true abilities. They seem to have bought into the notion that if you work hard enough and hold on to your dreams you can do anything. Of course, you can't do anything if you don't have the talent for it, no matter how hard you work or wish to make it happen. One of the funniest things on "American Idol" is watching people who don't make it promise that "I'll be back, you haven't heard the last of me America." You know I hate to break it to ya champ, but I think we can safely say that we have in fact heard the last of you.

Steve Salerno has a great piece at NRO in this subject called, Overdosing on Oprah:

But common sense suggests that this relentless emphasis on personal satisfaction betokens grim news for marriage, workplace camaraderie, or unity of any kind. One wonders how a nation comprising 295 million individuals, each vowing not to let anyone take away his dreams, could arrive at a true sense of collective purpose, especially with humility now in such short supply. Pop-psychology once taught us to wallow in our faults and limitations. It now teaches us to deny them, if not revel in them (as anyone who watches early-season episodes of American Idol can attest). As a culture, we went from impotence to omnipotence, sneering at the more realistic middle ground we sped past en route.

If empowerment is a quasi-religion -- which is how Oprah and some of its other champions seem to frame it -- perhaps it could use an updated version of the serenity prayer made popular by the twelve-step regimens it disdains: Something like, "Lord give me the enthusiasm to pursue what I excel at, the modesty to admit what I stink at, and the wisdom to know that there is a difference."


Amen.

While you're over at NRO, don't miss this update from Catherine Seipp on that beacon of tolerance and civil discourse, Lawrence O'Donnell. The man who once sought to shout down Swift Vet champion John O'Neil by screaming "Creepy Liar!!!" over and over again when the two appeared on MSNBC's Scarborough Country turned his ire Seipp's way on the Dennis Miller show:

I suspect, by the way, that this dynamic may have had something to do with how infuriated Lawrence O'Donnell got last week on Dennis Miller when I questioned his insistence that "every single one" of the teachers at his daughter's elite public elementary school was "GREAT!" (And maybe all the children there are above average?)

Perhaps hearing a woman suggest that he doesn't know quite as much about his child's school as he thinks he does pushed some of his buttons, because this really was an amazing meltdown -- which I now feel lucky to have witnessed before Miller was cancelled yesterday -- complete with clenched fist and throbbing neck veins.

But remembering how O'Donnell puffed up his chest, stuck out his manly jaw and sat up extremely straight as he became enraged on the Miller show -- I suppose so I could get the full effect of just how much taller he is than I -- makes me wonder about something I've noticed lately: When did it become O.K. for a man to yell at a woman in exactly the same tone he'd use with another man in a bar fight?


What a class act. You the man Lawrence. You the man.





NASA Needs To Get Bold

Ever since the end of the moon landing era, NASA has struggled to recapture the public's imagination (and with it the possibility of even more funding). Sure the occasional space probe will provide us with spectacular shots of other worlds, but most of NASA's current missions are nothing but after thoughts for vast majority of Americans. The only time we pay attention to the space shuttle is when it fails and the international space station has proven to be a big yawner.

So what can NASA do to once again get the space program front and center on the American cultural landscape?

Kurt at Writing History (another august member of the MOB) suggests that they get back to basics and focus on their true mission:

NASA claims its mission is to explore space but it isn't being honest with itself. What NASA does is explore things in space, moons, planets, suns and whatever else is flying around out there. Space is just the in-between stuff from here to there.

I propose NASA live up to its claim of space exploration and launch the first manned mission to space. They get a crew together, stock the space craft with a lifetime supply of Tang and crossword puzzles, pick a nice empty spot in space and LIFT OFF! Just like Star Trek, boldly going where no man has gone before.


And never coming back:

It would be the ride of a life time, in fact it would take a lifetime because there would be no returning, one way only. How bold would it be if they turned around half way and returned to earth? What is the point of this? Like any other exploration, to find out what's out there. No one knows what having human consciousness that far away from earth would be like.

But who would volunteer for such a mission?

Picking a crew wouldn't be as difficult as you first might think. There would have to be a certain religious element. Maybe some cloistered monks wanting a change of scenery. It might be kind of lonely if you're the last surveying member of the crew but you'd accept that possibility going in. Or how about some Scientologists, wasn't L. Ron a science fiction writer, seems like a perfect fit. They could let John Travolta steer.

While monks or Hollywood celebs might not be a bad way to go, why not turn this into the ultimate reality TV show? Instead of fifteen minutes of fame, you'd be signing up for a lifetime of stardom. As extreme as that notion may seem, I bet people would jump at the opportunity.

Start off with a bunch of contestants and let the public vote each week to narrow down the field and eventually pick the crew. Show them going through training. Show the launch and their continued adventures as they hurtle through space. You think people on the Real World get up in each other's faces? Imagine being stuck in a spaceship with seven or eight strangers for the REST of your life. We're talking ratings gold here baby.

I don't know about the technical considerations for building a ship that could undertake such a journey. But then again I ain't a rocket science, I'm an ideas man. Anyway those pointy headed geeks at NASA should be able to work out all of those sort of details. That's what we're paying them for, right?

Now we just need a name for the show...





Wednesday, May 11, 2005

How You Gonna Keep 'Em Down On The Farm?

You can hardly swing a dead prairie dog in the Twin Cities these days without hitting someone who has moved here from North Dakota. In fact, you can hardly swing a dead prairie dog in the broadcast booth during a NARN show without hitting someone who moved here from North Dakota (sorry about that stain on your shirt Mitch).

This migration out of North Dakota to greener pastures has been going on for years now, and, as is detailed in the latest issue of The Economist, it's becoming more and more of a problem:

HAVING survived the winter, North Dakota's stouter residents feel they may as well stick it out, at least till the end of summer. But many younger folk have already left. Cold is one of several reasons why the state has a "brain drain" problem.

Virtually all the state's counties have been losing well-educated young people to other states. Only Iowa retains fewer of its young home-grown college-educated residents. And, as with Iowa, lack of good jobs is another crucial factor. With farm jobs slipping away, North Dakota has struggled to find new ones in services.


Whenever you see your state being compared to Iowa, you know you're not in good shape.

But North Dakota's brain-drain problem is also, paradoxically, a symptom of its success in educating its residents. It has the second-highest high-school graduation rate in the country, and ranks first in the number of students who continue on to college. The trouble is that they don't stay: the state ranks 22nd in the proportion of residents over 25 with a college degree.

North Dakota's education system is essentially creating a pool of educated talent that other states reap the benefits of.

This may be changing, gradually. Census estimates for 2004 show that the state's population grew for the first time since 1996, albeit by barely 1,000 people, to 634,000. Births outnumbered deaths, and the number of college graduates staying in the state for at least a year after graduation rose 3.5% to 57%. Chuck in rising elementary- and secondary-school enrolment, and a new theory is emerging: young families are returning to North Dakota, particularly to its bigger towns and suburbs.

Laugh if you will, but any positive population growth is welcome news for the Peace Garden State. Of course, it is important to realize where that growth is taking place.

The main beneficiary is Fargo, North Dakota's largest city, which grew by more than 20% in the 1990s. Microsoft, which bought a local company in 2000, now employs 1,000 people there. The city is spreading outward into the Plains, and its downtown boasts an increasing number of chic restaurants, including one based vaguely on Berkeley's Chez Panisse.

I would love to see how a restaurant in Fargo can be "based vaguely" on a Berkeley hot spot.

The thing about Fargo is that it doesn't exactly represent the heart and soul of North Dakota. It sits on the eastern border of the state and in many ways it's relationship to the rest of the state is similar to that of the East Coast to the Midwest. Fargo is the Manhattan of North Dakota if you will. (To continue this thread, you could also say that Grand Forks is the Boston and Bismarck the Chicago.)

In short, though very white and staid, Fargo seems to be just interesting enough to lure back young professionals. Tamra McCullough left North Dakota for Seattle in 1995 and got a job at Starbucks Coffee's headquarters. In 2002 she returned to Fargo with a husband and a son. She was afraid they would get bored, but they didn't. She encouraged Starbucks to open a shop in Fargo last June.

Starbucks may hardly be the apex of hipness. But Joel Kotkin, a Los Angeles-based demographer, points out that good coffee is now part of the list of assets that North Dakota offers refugees from California and New York. The state's longer-established temptations are its schools and its clean air, plus the second-lowest average commute time in the nation and the lowest median house price.


Okay, so it's not exactly the Upper East Side. But to the folks in Richardton, Napoleon, or Rock Lake Rocklake (thanks Bill) it may as well be. And much of the state is not sharing in the growth and prosperity either.

None of this, of course, helps rural North Dakota, and many small farming towns are dying.

What to do?

This has led some locals to consider a modern version of an old idea, the Homestead Act of 1862, which helped to populate the Plains by giving settlers up to 640 acres of land in exchange for a commitment to stay for five years.

One of those lured by this bribe was the great-grandmother of Byron Dorgan, the state's Democratic senator. Mr Dorgan is the chief author of the New Homestead Act, which would provide a host of incentives to people who settle in counties that have lost more than 10% of their population in the past 20 years. These include tax credits for starting small businesses and buying homes, and a $3 billion venture-capital fund to seed new businesses.

Mr Dorgan has introduced the bill into the Senate twice already, in 2001 and 2003, with no success. Undeterred, he introduced a new version last month. "We may discover that [the demise of the Plains] was inevitable and there's nothing we can do about it," he admits. "But it won't be for lack of trying."


Dorgan never has passed on an opportunity to steer Federal pork to his state and it's the main reason why he keeps his seat in the Senate, despite not sharing the same political views as most NoDakians. In this case, it seems like even he realizes the hopelessness of the cause. You can throw more money at the problem, but you're not going to change the facts on the ground.

Young North Dakotans are going to continue to leave the small towns for better opportunities and lifestyles elsewhere. The best thing the state could do at this point is to try to make sure that more of those opportunities are available in places like Fargo, Bismarck, and Grand Forks. You aren't going to be able to keep 'em down on the farm, but you might be able to keep 'em in the state.





What Dreams May Come

Lately I've been remiss in not updating the Travels With Ralphie page, which chronicles the adventures of everyone's favorite bobble head doll with an uncanny resemblance to a nationally syndicated talk radio host . I have finally gotten around to adding a section on Ralphie's historic February space flight. For much more on Ralphie's quest to slip the surly bonds of earth, check out Team Vatsaas' Ralphie Goes Ballistic! page, which includes lots of pictures of Ralphie's flight along with a complete flight data summary.

What's next for Ralphie? No one knows for certain, but rumor has it that he will soon be meeting with a well known local politician (and fellow hockey fan), who some say may be a contender for the big prize in 2008. Ralphie in the White House some day? It never hurts to dream.





Looking At The World Through Brown Colored Glasses

I've never really been a "glass is half full" sort of person. When I look at that glass I can't help thinking that while it may very well be half full, I'll always know that the pitcher that filled it is at least that much emptier.

That sentiment certainly colored my thinking when Minnesota Vikings kicker Gary Anderson was lining up to attempt a routine 38 yard field goal with just over two minutes left to go in the 1999 NFC championship game. Nihilist In Golf Pants correctly chronicles my pre-kick prediction and...we all know how it turned out.

Some wish to pin the blame for that debacle on my pernicious pessimism. I say balderdash to all that...and I'll throw in a poppycock or two for good measure.

If my all too frequent predictions of doom for our local sports teams in general, and the Vikings in particular, had even the most tenuous link to causality we'd never even get the chance to celebrate a win in this city. Ask anyone who knows me...if "wearing your gamer" had the decisive influence on sporting events that Vox suggests it does, there is no way in hell that the Vikings would have won 15 games in 1999. Trust me.

All that aside, I've been known to be quite the optimist at times.

Take this past Sunday, for example, when the Twins' third string catcher (and fifth string DH) Matthew LeCroy was at bat with runners on first and third. I said "I'll bet he smashes one over the fence." Well...no...I didn't quite say it that way. I think what I said was more along the lines of "I'll bet that pathetic waste of human flesh is going to hit into a double play again."

The final box score reads that Matthew powered one over the left field fence for a three run homer...but I'll always know it was nothing more than a double play ball that hit one hell of an updraft somewhere between home plate and second base.

How's that for optimism?





Separated in the Sarcophagus?

Pharaoh of the 18th Dynasty of Egypt, King Tutankhamun, as imagined by the Supreme Council of Antiquities and the National Geographic Society.

and ...

Minnesota Twins 4th starter, Kyle Lohse, as imagined by his Fleer rookie card.
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Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Guess Who's Paying for Dinner

The Keegan's Thursday night trivia challenge continues to be a Mecca for all those interested in great food, strong drink, intense competition and the camaraderie of the local blogerati. More and more new faces are showing up each week, and if anyone is interested in joining the MOB, a Thursday night at Keegan's is the best way to go about it. Just last week an aspiring amateur Internet editorialist named Conrad Zero showed up, interfaced with representatives from Nihilist in Golf Pants and Eckernet.com, and now he's an o-fishul member of the organization. We welcome Conrad Zero to the fold.

He also does the service of informing us of another visitor to Keegan's last Thursday, a nationally prominent celebrity, no less. Robert Scoble of Scobleizer fame. To be frank, I'd never heard of the guy before (which Robert shouldn't feel slighted about, since I just started recognizing this fellow named "Mitch Berg" within the last 30 days). But I have been assured by trusted sources that in the world of corporate blogging infotainment, the man is a god. He's a Microsoft employee, paid to blog about all things Microsoft. (He's their Chief Humanizing Officer, according to the Economist). It's a revolution in corporate communications and Robert Scoble is one of the pioneers. And I didn't even know he was at Keegan's until after he left. Instead, I spent much of the evening debating the eating habits of cartoon donkeys with the Atomizer.

Our friend Chuck Olsen of Blogumentary fame (and now a correspondent for the video blog Rocketboom) brought him along, but Robert apparently never strayed from the cabal of MOB members gathered around the men?s room (our faction was located on the other side of the bar). Which teaches me to never reflexively flee excited chattering around the Keegan's men's room again.

Robert didn't tell any tales from his Keegan's experience, but he did promote his appearance in advance. I notice he was looking for "geeks" at Keegan's, which obviously explains why he never recognized me as one of the bloggers.

He also relayed some thoughts on the real purpose of his visit to Minneapolis, a seminar with hometown retailing hero Target, on how they can better utilize blogs in their corporate culture. And here's a listing of other local bloggers reporting on their visits with the Scobelizer, including their dinner at Whitey's. Key phrase to remember for next time he comes to town:

Microsoft took care of the tab. Thanks Robert! Thanks Bill Gates and Steve Ballmer!

Now I really wish I would have met him. Come back soon Robert Scoble.

THE ELDER ADDS: I too am disappointed that I missed an opportunity to chat with Robert last Thursday. Unlike Saint Paul, I was actually well aware of Scoble's corporate blogging fame. In fact, I even posted on it this past February.





A Slumbering Giant Awakens

The Huffington Post has only been in business for two days and we're already seeing the positive impact it's having on the local blogosphere. Usually the only thing that can prompt the Warrior Monk at Spitbull into action is a band of rabid squirrels. But today a foaming-at-the-mouth post at THP by squirrelly Jim Lampley was so egregiously over the top that the Monk had no choice but to intervene by picking up his staff and trying to knock some sense into Lampley by repeatedly beating him about the head. Tough love brother, tough love.

UPDATE: King Banaian pulls out his slide ruler and joins the Monk in hammering Lampley:

Let me add only one observation: Jim Lampley either doesn't know what he's talking about, or he's lying.





Rude Awakening

As it becomes apparent that ideological diversity is to be a permanent fixture on the editorial page of the Pioneer Press, the blissfully complacent circulation segment who were more than happy to pay for an unyielding stream of DFL talking points, day after day after blessed day, are slowly being roused. Here's the latest outburst, a letter to the editor from an outraged reader responding to Craig Westover's brilliant, insightful interview of David Strom on May 4:

Craig Westover's May 4 column was a feeble attempt to polish David Strom's tainted image. Westover and Strom reside in the same neocon camp where truth-twisting is standard operating procedure.

A damn lie! Although it is true David Strom and Craig Westover were assigned to the same cabin at Neocon Camp last year, and both received merit badges in Truth Twisting (not to mention War Mongering and Lack of Compassion for the Poor), the standard operating procedure at Neocon camp is NOT truth twisting. It is "To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!." Get your facts straight, sir.

Westover's real purpose: Clean up the messenger and maybe the message won't have quite the stink. The neocons have been very successful at redefining our language. Westover deceitfully described Strom as a "populist." Strom may be a lot of things, but he is certainly not a populist. In fact, Strom represents the very privileged elite that the populists and progressives have opposed over the years.

Because nothing says "privileged elite" like buying a lot in North Minneapolis, hiring a first time contractor to build a house, and living like an itinerant soap salesman for six months while sweating out a $12,000 legal judgment over faulty drywall spackling.

Language is important. Just because a demagogue can draw a crowd, that does not make him a populist. History is replete with windbags, and while I will avoid unseemly but accurate comparisons, I suggest that the Pioneer Press assign a top-notch editor to keep an eye on Westover. This is not an issue of opinion, it's simple truth-telling. My parakeet says thanks for another Westover column to read while he's doing his business.

As delusional as these concerns are, the management of the Pioneer Press is committed to being responsive to any and all suggestions submitted by readers. This irate fellow should be comforted to know a top notch editor, the Associate Editorial Page editor himself, has been assigned to keeping an eye on Westover. Days, nights, weekends, whatever it takes. In fact, here's a shot of the stringent quality control meeting and performance evaluation, held last Saturday.

Go back to sleep sir and rest easy, the future of your hometown newspaper is in good hands.
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Monday, May 09, 2005

The Bitter Science

Rumor has it that noted blogger and World Net Daily columnist Vox Day will be making a rare visit to the Twin Cities in the not so distant future. And it sounds like he's got a little payback in mind:

I do hope someone nearby gave him a resounding slap on the back of the head after that happened. Come to think of it, I may do it myself when I finally meet Atomizer. It's not that I'm still bitter, it's just that I'm still pissed.

Upon learning of Vox's intent to whup up on Atomizer, the Nihilist In Golf Pants suggested that there may be a more constructive approach to help these gentlemen settle their differences. We've been trying to come up with a worthy event for the next gathering of the Minnesota Organization of Bloggers (MOB) and the Nihilist believes he has just the ticket:

A boxing contest between Vox and Atomizer.

Not bad for starters, but I think we can make it even more interesting. How about an Extreme Fighting cage match between the two? The bad news for Atomizer is that Vox is a professionally trained martial arts champion. The good news is that no extreme fighter has ever died in the US as the result of a match (yet). And he has still has plenty of time to get in shape for the bout.

All he has to do is cut down on the drinking and smoking, start a rigorous daily workout program, and learn to harness his bitterness and channel it into positive energy. Washing and waxing my car sounds like a good way to start with the latter.

UPDATE: Rew from The Power Liberal has suggested that we dub the event "Voxxy Boxing." Brilliant idea.





Can't Buy Me Cred

The big news in the 'sphere today is the launch of The Huffington Post, Arianna Huffington's project to gather together a menagerie of celebrities, media types, politicos, and even apparently a few "regular" people to blog. There are rumored to be over THREE HUNDRED contributors signed on to this effort. There are big names in this bunch, and, even though most of these would be bloggers hail from the Left side of the aisle, there are a couple of noted conservatives as well.

In order to help cut through the clutter the site has a "Featured Posts" section, which is designed to highlight the best of the field. There also is a "News Wire", which has links to breaking news and a large cross section of news sources.

Design wise it looks and feels pretty good. It's not overloaded with graphics and is easy to navigate and read. There doesn't seem to be a way to read all the posts by a specific author yet, although maybe that will be available as more material is posted.

But good looks only get you so far in the blogging racket (with the mysterious exception of Wonkette). For at the end of the day, most readers would agree that content is indeed king (Why else would this guy be getting heavy traffic?).

And the content at The Huffington Post is a decidedly mixed bag. I know that it's extremely early to be making such judgments, but I don't see how this amalgamation of "talent" is possibly going to work. Sure, I have enough morbid curiosity to read one post by Ellen DeGeneres on the gubamint turning wild horses into cat food, but am I going to keep coming back day after day for this?

Yes, there's an post on Yalta by well known historian Arthur Schlesinger Jr. that I might be interested in reading. But how much ridiculous crap (like this uninformed, unfunny post on gay marriage by the husband and wife team of Julia-Louis Dreyfus and Brad Hall) must I wade through to get to the good stuff? From the looks of it so far, way too much.

The other reason that I don't believe that The Huffington Post is going to succeed is the way that it's been created. Rather than building from the ground up, this is yet another effort to try to skip most of the development process and launch a finished product. When I read things like this:

Huffingtonpost.com has a dozen investors, from her partner Ken Lerer, a former AOL Time Warner executive, to Larry David. The site, which has seven paid staffers, including a former Matt Drudge researcher, will sell advertising, and Tribune Media plans to syndicate weekly highlights.

and this:

"The great thing about blogging is that your thoughts don't have to have a beginning, middle and end," says Huffington, arguing that famous folks are usually too busy to craft an op-ed piece. "You can just put a thought out there in the cultural bloodstream."

I can't help but compare it to the arrogance and unfounded optimism that greeted the launch of Air America.

You can almost see the same sort of thought process taking place.

"This whole talk radio/blogging thing can't be that difficult. If we just get some big names, an organization, and funding, we can do it even better than these schmucks who have succeeded in it already."

It didn't work for Air America and I doubt if it will work for The Huffington Post either. Like Air America, I don't think that The Huffington Post will disappear completely. With the funding and sheer number of contributors, it would hard to imagine that it could crash and burn anytime soon. It will linger on for some time as a marginal player, and, also like Air America, will be a source for plenty of fodder for bloggers like us with a penchant for mockery. Welcome aboard.





Sunday, May 08, 2005

Measuring Up

Star Tribune "reader's rep" Kate Parry departs from custom this week and uses her column to actually address real complaints from readers (what a novel concept):

"Twins, Hennepin have stadium deal" proclaimed the lead front-page headline on Sunday, April 24. "Will it fly?" was the front-page headline Monday. "Pawlenty: Twins plan reasonable" led Tuesday's front page.

That was when frustrated reader Dennis Wagner e-mailed this observation: "Interesting there wasn't an opposing view with similar inches in the Star Tribune on the stadium deal. Fair and balanced, or bought and paid for?" asked Wagner, who lives in the Jordan neighborhood and is sales and marketing director for Gryphics, a high-tech firm in Plymouth. He was joined by a furious flurry of readers objecting to the stadium plan and feeling underrepresented in coverage.


A taxpayer financed stadium proposal is big news here in the Twin Cities and the Strib feels that it's important to provide fair and balanced coverage:

Editor Anders Gyllenhaal disagrees that opponents were underrepresented in initial coverage. "Opponents are quoted in every single story that's been done," he said, calling the coverage "decidedly balanced," with multiple opponents quoted in each package. "My goal is to provide coverage that's straight down the middle," he said.

"Straight down the middle" sounds like a noble goal indeed. But how to measure your objectivity on the matter?

One way to examine balance is to measure space devoted to opposing views. I don't look for perfectly equal space, but I get wary when I see big disparities over several days. I got out the ruler and here's what I found:

First-day coverage that ran Sunday, April 24, included 100.5 column inches of story, headlines, photos and graphics. Of that, 3.5 inches were about concerns raised about the plan, 13 inches went to proponents and the rest to explaining the details....

...On Monday morning, the coverage totaled 87 inches. Of that, 1.25 inches of text came from opponents and 3 inches from clear supporters -- most of that story was about whether the deal could make it through the County Board and Legislature. Four quotes from citizens on page one included two favoring the deal, one unsure and one against. On an inside page, one more citizen was quoted opposing it and two favored it.

On the third day, in 114 inches of coverage, there were two quotes for and two quotes against on page one, but you had to read 53 inches into the package before learning that the Minneapolis legislative delegation was split -- a development I thought should have been mentioned on page one even if it couldn't be fully explored until further down in the story. On the editorial page the newspaper endorsed the plan, and ran three opposing letters and one favoring it.

On the fourth day, opponents were the central focus of a story on a County Board meeting. But that stadium story ended up back on the Metro/State cover -- not buried, but not page one. Managing editor Scott Gillespie noted that with the board postponing its vote, the story lacked an outcome.


I applaud Parry's willingness to analyze the paper's coverage of the stadium issue. And it looks like she's come up with a viable, if not perfect method for measuring the bias of the newspaper toward each side of the issue. Obviously it's important to know if the paper really is providing coverage on the stadium that is "straight down the middle", as they aim to.

In the last ten years, the Star Tribune has probably received 12,876,546 complaints of liberal bias in their coverage of politics. Yet, to the best of my knowledge, there has never been an in-house analysis of the newspaper's balance in this area. Now that Perry has established a rough procedure by which to measure such balance, would it not make sense for the paper to perform the same sort of focused analysis on their political coverage?

Don't put that ruler away just yet Kate. There's plenty of measuring yet to do.





So Many Rallies, So Little Time

Activists walk and rally for peace:

Peace activists juggled umbrellas and anti-war signs Saturday at a Mother's Day Walk for Peace at the Lyndale Park Peace Garden in south Minneapolis.

Diane Steen-Hinderlie of St. Louis Park, a member of the anti-torture group "Tackling Torture at the Top," said she had to choose between a rally for social justice at the State Capitol or the Lake Harriet rally.


Decisions, decisions. What's a Lefty of good conscience to do?





Saturday, May 07, 2005

Not Acting In My Back Yard

Peter e-mails to point out that there is a country that could do something about ending the genocide in Darfur quite easily if it wanted to:

Prior to 1956 (or 57), the Sudan was the Anglo-Egyptian Sudan, a joint colonial operation. If the Egyptians wished to stop the killing in the Sudan, the Egyptians ought to be able to do it quickly. They do have a large army and air force. [For the most part equipped by the United States.]

But they don't have an interest in this sort of caring venture. This sort of venture is left to those suffering advanced white guilt, ready to accept blame for all crimes committed by non whites against other non whites. Almost no black African or Arab (of any color) cares about such inhumanity, for they are returning to slavey (as owners of slaves).


This is echoed by Joseph Britt in a post at THE BELGRAVIA DISPATCH where he also takes some shots at a couple of noted columnists:

The Arab world isn't even doing that about Darfur. No peacekeepers, no aid, no media coverage, and for damn sure no guilt. Does Tom Friedman during all his earnest chin-stroking about the problem of terrorism and Arab culture pause to consider that this might be related somehow? Saudi imams get young men inspired to blow themselves up in the middle of Iraqi crowds, but we sure don't hear too many reports of young Saudi men risking death to stand between Muslim villagers in Darfur and the janjaweed.

What about Nick Kristof, who has access to the same maps of Africa that the rest of us do? Does he wonder that the largest Arab country, directly north of Sudan with a large army and an air force hundreds of planes strong, has never made a move toward establishing, say, a no-fly zone over any part of Darfur? Demanded UN sanctions against Sudan, or imposed any of its own? To be honest, I doubt the idea has even crossed his mind.

You don't need to be a master geo-strategist or have a doctorate in comparative anthropology to figure out that a culture and religion indifferent or worse to murder on a large scale is going to be a problem for the civilized countries. Egyptian, Saudi, and other Arab Muslims who object to this characterization of them have it within their power to prove me wrong, or not, by what they finally do about Darfur. Journalists like Friedman and Kristof can make their contribution by writing about it, even if it does mean they have to pick up a few checks the next time they're in Cairo.






Friday, May 06, 2005

Cat Blogging By Proxy

Two things:

1. It's not my cat

2. It does have a topical connection

Terri gives us teenager Eartha Kitt and her way to raise awareness about violence against females:



As Terri explains, the issue is all too real for Ms. Kitt:

Eartha lives with a huge male cat, Quincy Jones, who is about 5 pounds heavier than her.....he agresses against her, "backbiting" her (is that where the term comes from?) even though he has long ago lost his...status as a true male.





Sign #216 That You're Getting Older

While enjoying a night out at your favorite local watering hole, you're given free beer as part of a "retro" promotion, but you set it aside, preferring to pay to drink beer that doesn't taste like swill to you. Turning down free beer? Might as well get started on that AARP application now...

Such was the scene last night at Keegan's Irish Pub. The Fraters trivia squad returned to our rightful place as champions, although we had to share the glory with a team made up of the The Night Writer, his wife, and the crazy kids from The Attic.

Those lucky enough to be in attendance last night were also able to catch a not-so-rare glimpse of Atomizer in action and they now know that his reputation for angry outbursts is more than merely the stuff of legends. This time his venom was not directed at a sports team, but rather one of his trivia teammates, who apparently was overly dismissive of Atomizer's suggested answer to a question.

Atomizer expressed his opinion of his teammate's attitude in no uncertain terms, before stalking outside to have a smoke and cool off. For a moment it looked like this dissension might affect the outcome of the competition as there were still a few questions left, but we were able to rally and close out the victory. In hindsight, it appears to have been a wily move by Atomizer to shake things up a bit and provide us with the motivation we needed to win. Crazy like a fox is he.

The best part of the confrontation was that two "grown" men were on the verge of coming to blows because of a question in a pub trivia competition. A question about Winnie The Pooh. Specifically, a question that asked what Eeyore's favorite food was. You gotta love that kind of passion.

By the way, the answer is thistles. And yes, we got it wrong.





And You Think You've Got A Bad Job?

Or a sadistic boss? You'd be hard pressed to match Radio Blogger's grueling day of Disney hell. Talk about cruel and unusual.




gonna have myself a time

This Saturday the Northern Alliance Radio Network will once again be broadcasting live from the White Bear Lake Superstore. If you live in the Twin Cities and want a behind the scenes glimpse into the magic of live radio or would like to meet the NARN crew or are in the market for a new ride, come on up to White Bear Lake, stop by the Super Store, and say hi.

We'll be joined in the second hour by the ubiquitous Brian Anderson, author of South Park Conservatives : The Revolt Against Liberal Media Bias. Brian has been all over the media in the last few weeks (including being interviewed by our good friend Scott Johnson at Power Line) and we're excited to welcome him to the show.

I read South Park Conservatives on the flight to San Diego a few weeks ago and it's easy to see why the book is attracting so much attention. Hopefully I'll be able to share some further thoughts on it later today.

Meanwhile, if you've read the book, are currently reading it, or just have an interest in the subjects of new media and the growing popularity of conservatism among young people, give us a call during the second hour on Saturday. Noon to 3pm. Listen to the stream here.

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Thin Blue Line

St. Paul officer killed in shooting outside bar:

An undercover St. Paul police officer was shot and killed outside an East Side bar early today, and scores of officers are still searching for two suspects.

Gerald Vick, a 15-year veteran of the force, was pronounced dead on arrival at Regions Hospital in St. Paul.

Vick, 41, and Officer Joe Strong had been working a routine vice unit assignment at Erick's Bar at 949 E. 7th St. Vick was shot in a nearby alley at 2:22 a.m., said Police Chief John Harrington. Strong returned fire, but Harrington said it's unclear if either of the two suspects was injured.

Around the scene of the shooting at Seventh Street and Reaney Avenue, more than 100 officers cordoned off more than a square mile looking for the suspects. Helicopters were hovering overhead. Officers from other law enforcement agencies joined in the search.


Gerald Vick R.I.P. The scum who did this should rot in hell.





Thursday, May 05, 2005
I'm Beginning To See The Light

In response to my most recent sports related meltdown (number 12 if you're keeping score) reader Ron writes in with some words of encouragement:
The Twins bases-loaded batting average will be fine. The ironic thing is that having the bases loaded usually means that you don't have the speed to score from second on a single. Besides, all stats in baseball before June 1st are to be ignored!
Oh that's just great! Not only do I have to worry about the Twins inability to get clutch hits, now I have to be concerned about their lack of speed on the base paths? Thanks for nothing, Ron.

I'm only kidding, of course. Ron is entirely correct. It's still too early in the season to panic. Besides, once Frank Thomas rejoins the Chicago White Sox around mid-July he'll drag his team's morale back down into the filthy sewers of the South Side where it belongs and the Twins will march forward to their fourth consecutive AL Central Division championship.

Ron continues:
...(Y)ou should come see the St. Paul Saints! (Our bases-loaded batting average is currently 1.000) We are having a blogger night on June 13th! If you want more information on it, it's on my blog: www.rightfieldron.blogspot.com
He's right again. For only $8, bloggers and their pals get a general admission ticket to see the St. Paul Saints battle the hated Fargo-Moorhead Redhawks, a voucher for a hot dog and a beverage (adult varieties included, I presume) and a Saints cap. All that and Mudonna, the team pig, to boot. I'm sold.

Only thing is, if I see two lazy infield flies and a strikeout with the bases loaded on June 13th, I'm coming directly for Ron. That kind of crap belongs indoors.

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Back In The Red Zone

Steven Vincent is back in Iraq. You can read all about his latest round of hazardous duty at his blog, In the Red Zone.





Happy Cinco De Mayo!

The Economist optimistically reports that Mexico's political crisis is resolved:

AN ANCIENT Greek saying has it that the fox knows many small things, while the hedgehog knows but one big thing. In Mexican politics, however, it is President Vicente Fox who looks like the hedgehog. His contention that it was time for a change after seven decades of one-party rule took him to an historic election victory in 2000. Since then, he has shown little grasp of the many small things required for a successful presidency. That lack of subtlety showed in a blunt and controversial effort to block Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador, the leftist mayor of Mexico City, from standing in next year's presidential election through a prosecution widely seen as politically motivated.

On Wednesday May 4th, Mr Fox finally abandoned that effort. His new attorney general, Daniel Cabeza de Vaca, announced that the charges against Mr Lopez Obrador, which arise from a planning dispute, would be dropped, allowing him to stand for the presidency. Mr Fox and the mayor are to meet, presumably to bury the dispute.


It should say "Mexico's current political crisis resolved for now." Vicente Fox has been a big disappointment as president, both to Mexicans hoping for real reform in their country's political and economic structures and to Americans hoping for a friend south of the border. But as poor as his performance has been, if Obrador is elected in 2006, we may well be pining for the glory days of the Fox administration.





The Paper You Love to Hate (and Start Fires With)

Doug from A Million Monkeys Typing (a fine MOB member) provides feedback on the question I posed a few days ago, about why any conservatively minded citizen would subscribe to the Star Tribune. McClatchy marketers, take note of these pressure points for your future promotional efforts:

When I'm done reading it, the paper makes a fine dropcloth for cleaning the guns the Strib's editors would rather I did not have.

The used newsprint makes an excellent starter for my charcoal grill.

Last but not least, after reading their editorial pages I have incentive to work on my writing skills in order to complain, rebut, and otherwise opine. They in their way are the prod that got me started blogging. (Ok, that's maybe a strike against them... .)






More Bitter Than Sweet

Sounds as if Atomizer is rather despondent over the Twins recent struggles to get key hits when the sacks are full. Who knew that he was so passionate about such matters?

The boys at Nihilist in Golf Pants did. Check out their Top 11 Most Bitter Moments In Atomizer's Sports Life.





Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Able Was I Ere I Saw The 2005 Twins

Tonight's game was the clincher. With three bases loaded opportunities against the Cleveland Indians (two of them with nobody out) the Minnesota Twins' mighty sluggers dug deep down within themselves and produced one...lousy...run. For those of you not paying attention, that brings the Twins season average with the base pads full down to an incredibly pathetic .135 (or 5-37) with just 12 runs batted in.

In order for me to regain my sanity, I must now place myself into a self-imposed state of exile. Every single one of my waking moments from now until the Twins bring their bases loaded batting average safely above the Mendoza line will be spent seeking peace and serenity through quiet meditation, desperate prayer and copious amounts of very strong alcohol and unfiltered Lucky Strikes.

These will be difficult times as I fully expect to lose my job, alienate my family and friends and further degrade my already inadequate physical health. On the bright side, however, my upcoming mental and physical breakdown should have very little effect on the frequency of my contributions to Fraters Libertas. In other words, you won't even know I'm gone.





Pros and Cons

Recognition goes out to Mark Yost for the straight shot of provocative and conservative editorial writing in the Pioneer Press yesterday, the likes of which this town may never have seen before. Excerpt from his piece on the public employee union's attempt to sue the government (that's YOU) to maintain their monopoly on providing road side garbage pick up:

If you've driven Minnesota's highways during the summer, you're familiar with the hard-working, altruistic public servants the union is defending. There's usually five or six of them standing around drinking coffee, ogling the buxom flag girl in short shorts, while the one college kid on the crew works his tail off and you inch your way through the egregiously misnamed "work zone." It's ironic, but true, that state employees are probably the one group that make prisoners look sympathetic.

Yes, he's saying what all commuters are thinking! In a space which was assumed for decades to be a DFL and their pet special interest group safe zone. Needless to say, this will be culture shock to long time subscribers not accustomed to diversity of opinion in their local paper. Heck, Yost can't even write a sober review of a choral performance without getting lit up. This, from yesterday's letters to the editor:

If you paid Mark Yost for his anemic review of Britten's "War Requiem," you ought to get your money back and your subscribers ought to get a rebate. None of us got our money's worth with that one. Did he simply not have anything meaningful to say, or did your editors not give him the space?

Interesting to note, Yost picks which letters get printed, including that one. So, when he gets besieged over his column on unions by outraged net tax consumers happy to get paid for a better Minnesota , I'm sure he'll have no hesitation to print the most virulent of the bunch. The guy is from Brooklyn (not Park), he can take the heat.

According to Mitch, some of the local yokels formerly providing the unchallenged lockstep liberal opinion in the Pioneer Press have already registered their objections. I suppose reactionary invective is inevitable from those resistant to progress. If I were Mark, I wouldn't take the scratchy AM signal caterwauling from the exiles of mainstream media too seriously. They're probably just upset that they never got published in the Wall Street Journal.





Scott McClellan: Enabler

Jay Rosen has a humorous post at Press Think called Stop Us Before We're Briefed Again:

The headline at Romenesko caught my eye. "D.C. bureau chiefs: No more background-only WH briefings." Wow, I thought, they finally did it. They quit the racket. But no. They had not. They had sent an e-mail around, and asked Scott McClellan to change his ways. They had vowed to object some more, later. Joe Strupp's account in Editor and Publisher tells of it:

In an e-mail to several dozen bureau chiefs Monday, a group of top D.C. bureau bosses urged their colleagues to push more for on-the-record briefings when government officials deem them to be on background only.

"We'd like to make a more concerted effort among the media during the month of May to raise objections as soon as background briefings are scheduled by any government official, whether at the White House, other executive agencies or the Hill," the e-mail said, in part.



Conspicuous for going unmentioned was one of the most effective ways the press can "raise objections" to background briefings: don't go to them. Just quit.


Apparently White House reporters are irresistibly drawn to these background-only briefings like Marion Barry to crack parties with whores and have asked Scott McClellan to cease and desist with these briefings because the reporters just can't control themselves. Perhaps instead of looking to McClellan for the solution they should turn inward, admit they have a problem, and take the first step to recovery.

1. We admitted that we were powerless over background-only White House briefings -- that our lives had become unmanageable.

A good place to start.

2. We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Oh oh. This could be a tough one for a lot of reporters.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

The G word? Houston, we definitely have a problem.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

For some of the White House reporters, this is like taking an inventory of a sewage treatment plant.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

If they need any help with the wrongs, I'll there for them.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

All the defects of character? That's a tall order, even for the Man Upstairs.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Again, I can help with that list.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

1. The American people...

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Ari Fleischer is waiting by his phone. Patiently.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

That will be the day.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to reporters, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.


You know, on second thought, maybe it is easier just to get McClellan to stop the briefings.





Walk 50 Meters in His Shoes

We and our Austrian software partners are proud to announce the latest in our series of Fraters Libertas living history virtual reality games. It's Wagenschenke! Which, loosely translated, means "Help the Atomizer walk home from Al's Bar". Yes, it's a simulation of our own Atomizer's nightly ritual from his carefree bachelor days in the early to mid to late 1990's.

Follow the link, let it load, click on the Start sign and with your counterbalancing mouse, help guide his woozy path homeward. Or, if your manual dexterity is lacking, watch him do a face plant on the sidewalk and promptly pass out. Either way you're learning about history and having fun, which makes everyone a winner. Enjoy.

THE ELDER ADDS: They've really done their homework to make this simulation as authentic as possible, right down to Atomizer sucking his thumb after passing out. You almost feel as if you're really there.





Trifecta!

The Tinker to Evers to Chance of the local right-wing daisy chain? Some people seem to think so. Connect the dots people. Connect the dots.





Tuesday, May 03, 2005

The Long Goodbye

This Wall Street Journal article on the decline of newspaper circulations presents the welcome news that just maybe the laws of economics are not exempt in the world of journalism. While the product being supplied by the mainstream media (information) is still in high demand, if the quality is substandard, consumers will find other outlets. Thanks to the Internet, this is increasingly true even in markets where the daily hard copy deliverable previously had a monopoly status.

The newspaper industry, already suffering from circulation problems, could be looking at its worst numbers in more than a decade.

Circulation numbers to be released today by the Audit Bureau of Circulations probably will show industrywide declines of 1% to 3%, according to people familiar with the situation -- possibly the highest for daily newspapers since the industry shed 2.6% of subscribers in 1990-91.

The biggest publishers may show the largest declines: Gannett Co., which owns about 100 newspapers, says it will be down "a couple of points" from last year's levels. Circulation at Tribune Co.'s Los Angeles Times is likely to be off in excess of 6% of its most recently reported figures. Belo Corp.'s Dallas Morning News expects to report daily circulation down 9% and Sunday circulation down 13% from the year-earlier period. All projected figures are for the six months ended in March.


Unfortunately, this trend hasn't yet extended to all substandard information providing monopoly outlets. The sun still shines on the local provider of the product:

McClatchy Co., which has posted 20 straight years of subscriber growth -- an unprecedented record in the industry -- uses everything from door-to-door sales crews to sending lapsed subscribers handwritten notes imploring them to resubscribe. McClatchy is a small newspaper chain that operates 12 dailies, including the Sacramento Bee and the Minneapolis Star Tribune.

It's hard to believe marketing gimmicks alone can account for the Star Tribune's success in holding its circulation. For whatever reason, it still has a this community under a spell that will not be as easily broken as in other markets. Why any of the tens of thousands on conservatively-minded readers would ever support this unremittingly shrill, hostile, and insulting forum for liberalism is beyond me. For many, I suppose the sports page, the Target ads, and the James Lileks columns are enough to maintain a Minnesota complacency in the face of damage to one's political and ideological interests.

I also suspect it's lack of knowledge that other information outlets exist which keeps many people dependent on the thump of the rolled up broadsheet on their steps every morning. This means sustained circulation numbers at the Star Tribune may be a function of demographics. As their readership ages and withers away, and are not replaced by younger readers who are quite versant on the other options available, the reversal of their unprecedented record of growth may finally be realized.

It seems the Star Tribune is aware of this possibility, if their so-called Reader's Representative can be believed. In Sunday's Kate Parry column, she details some focus group outreach being conducted by the editorial staff, including this insight gleaned from a member of the target demographic:

Kate Lasota, a junior at Spring Lake Park High School, explained how urgent it was for editors to think about readers her age. "You're going to want to hook my age group right now by directing a few things towards me, some things I want to hear and read about. Because as I go off to college it's going to be, 'Which do I want to read?' I have that choice and you want my business."

Yes ... very interesting. People want stuff that appeals to their interests. Write what people want to read about, and they'll read your publication. Eureeka!

This type of feedback reminds me of the focus group for Itchy and Scratchy conducted on the Simpsons. The earnest market researcher's summary:

Okay, how many of you kids would like Itchy & Scratchy to deal with real-life problems, like the ones you face every day? (the kids all cheer and agree) And who would like to see them do just the opposite - getting into far-out situations involving robots and magic powers? (more cheering) So, you want a realistic, down-to-earth show... that's completely off-the-wall and swarming with magic robots? (The kids agree)

One would hope the Star Tribune realizes the need for some slightly more sophisticated data analysis to overcome their impending problems. Although the very fact the Reader's Representative chose that quote, and that one alone, as an example of the feedback received doesn't bode well for their understanding of the problem.

Or perhaps the entire exercise of shipping a vanload of Star Tribune editors to Anoka county to eat and see what the common folk do is just another marketing gimmick, the kind of which they are crediting their past record of success to.

In case they are looking for substantive, specific feedback, I'll give them one nugget of gold. Get a Reader's Representative who doesn't devote space in every column to throwing bouquets to her colleagues. You know, her colleagues - the reporters and editors, those folks she's supposed to be skeptical about, even critical of, when a reader lodges a legitimate complaint.

From this same column about reaching out and better understanding the readers, here's the Reader's Representative getting out her sorrowful violin to help us better understand who the editors are:

I watch them start the day early and end it late, booked solid with meetings and more meetings about the day's news, personnel issues and all the time-devouring tasks of management. Many days they are lucky just to grab a sandwich at their desks and spend time with their families at day's end.

And this, revealing the real objective of the focus group in Anoka County:

Readers were meeting people they had thought of as "the media" and getting to know them as moms and dads, coaches and volunteers, people who care about their kids and their communities -- just like the Anoka County residents.

If I was sitting through that torturous ordeal, I'd be tempted to unleash this edited part of the Alec Baldwin speech from Glengarry Glen Ross:

Nice guy? I don't give a sh*t. Good father. F*ck you, go home and play with your kids. You want to work here, [start writing more intelligent and fair minded editorials]. You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you c*ck-sucker. You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on [Fraters Libertas, Shot in the Dark, and Powerline]. If you don't like it, leave.

But, if imperiously patronizing the customers and attempting to guilt trip them into accepting a substandard product because the producers have kids and "care" about the community is the way to business success, the Star Tribune has a long and glorious future ahead of it. For a monopoly, I'm sure it has always worked in the past.
.





Eat At Hugh's? (Updated)

Friday, in the first hour of his nationally syndicated radio show, Hugh Hewitt mentioned that he had a "great idea" while on a recent road trip. He wants to open a high end restaurant called "Hugh's Place." The kind of place where you could smoke a good cigar, enjoy a very dry Martini, sip a fine wine, and enjoy a top notch steak without having to be bothered by the softball playing riff raff. All this provided by a guy who knows nothing about cigars, Martinis, or wine? It could be a little dicey. Although it appears that he hasn't exactly pushed himself away from the table when it comes to steak, so maybe it could work out after all.

Every good restaurant needs a good sign and that's where you can come in. What would the sign that graces the front of "Hugh's Place" look like? Sharpen up those Photoshop skills and submit your entries to rightwinger23@hotmail.com

We'll post the best ones here for all to enjoy.

UPDATE: The Colonel from West Coast Pundits is on the board with the first entry. (Click to enlarge)




I don't know if it's exactly what Hugh had in mind, but I could see the Bushies starting off their day there.

UPDATE II: It's not the best quality of work, but Sisyphus has his heart in the right place.

Meanwhile, Terri submits some possible advertising copy for Hugh's Place. Hungry yet?





Monday, May 02, 2005

Prized Pundits

Over fifty top bloggers (and yours truly) voted for their favorite columnists in the latest survey from John Hawkins at Right Wing News. My top choice was the group's number one selection as well. But how in the name of everything good and decent does David Limbaugh finish ahead of WF Buckley? That is just not right.





The Quickening

From the April 23rd edition of The Economist:

"I BELIEVE too many of us editors and reporters are out of touch with our readers," Rupert Murdoch, the boss of News Corporation, one of the world's largest media companies, told the American Society of Newspaper Editors last week. No wonder that people, and in particular the young, are ditching their newspapers. Today's teens, twenty- and thirty-somethings "don't want to rely on a god-like figure from above to tell them what's important," Mr Murdoch said, "and they certainly don't want news presented as gospel." And yet, he went on, "as an industry, many of us have been remarkably, unaccountably, complacent."

The speech--astonishing not so much for what it said as for who said it--may go down in history as the day that the stodgy newspaper business officially woke up to the new realities of the internet age. Talking at times more like a pony-tailed, new-age technophile than a septuagenarian old-media god-like figure, Mr Murdoch said that news "providers" such as his own organisation had better get web-savvy, stop lecturing their audiences, "become places for conversation" and "destinations" where "bloggers" and "podcasters" congregate to "engage our reporters and editors in more extended discussions." He also criticised editors and reporters who often "think their readers are stupid."


Hmmm...Sounds like just the kind of thing that these guys have been talking about for some time. The economic consequences of not "migrating" where the audience has already begun to shift to is becoming increasingly obvious:

Mr Murdoch's argument begins with the fact that newspapers worldwide have been--and seem destined to keep on--losing readers, and with them advertising revenue. In 1995-2003, says the World Association of Newspapers, circulation fell by 5% in America, 3% in Europe and 2% in Japan. In the 1960s, four out of five Americans read a paper every day; today only half do so.

Older people, whom Mr Murdoch calls "digital immigrants", may not have noticed, but young "digital natives" increasingly get their news from web portals such as Yahoo! or Google, and from newer web media such as blogs. Short for "web logs", these are online journal entries of thoughts and web links that anybody can post. Whereas 56% of Americans haven't heard of blogs, and only 3% read them daily, among the young they are standard fare, with 44% of online Americans aged 18-29 reading them often, according to a poll by CNN/USA Today/Gallup.

The April 30th edition of the same fine magazine features news on changes Google is making to its AdSense service:

Google's new services extends AdSense in three ways. Instead of Google's software analysing third-party websites to determine from their content what relevant ads to place on them, advertisers will instead be able to select the specific sites where they want their ads to appear. This provides both more flexibility and control, says Patrick Keane, Google's head of sales strategy. Companies trying to raise awareness of a brand often want a high level of control over where their ads appear.

The second change involves pricing. Potential internet advertisers must bid for their ad to appear on a "cost-per-thousand" (known as CPM) basis. This is similar to TV commercials, where advertisers pay according to the number of people who are supposed to see the ad. But the Google system delivers a twist: CPM bids will also have to compete against rival bids for the same ad space from those wanting to pay on a "cost-per-click" basis, the way search terms are presently sold. Click-through marketing tends to be aimed at people who already know they want to buy something and are searching for product and price information, whereas display advertising is more often used to persuade people to buy things in the first instance.

The third change is that Google will now offer animated ads--but nothing too flashy or annoying, insists Mr Keane. Google has long been extremely conservative about the use of advertising; it still plans to use only small, text-based ads on its own search sites. But many of its AdSense partners might well be tempted by the prospect of earning a share of revenue from display and animated ads too, especially as such ads are likely to be more appealing to some of the big-brand advertisers.


The current AdSense format doesn't seem to work well for anyone. Let's hope that these changes improve that situation.





Song Dedication

Pat Robertson on the American judiciary:

Acknowledging several passages from his new book - where he charged that liberals were engaging in "an all-out assault on Christianity," and that Democrats wanted to appoint judges who would "dismantle our Christian culture" - Robertson told ABC that the federal judiciary, as currently constituted, represents the biggest threat to America in its history. He warned: "They're destroying the fabric that holds our nation together."

His interviewer, George Stephanopolous, asked whether Robertson was saying that the threat posed by federal judges was more dire than the Civil War, World War II, and the terrorists who struck on Sept. 11. Robertson replied: "I really believe that. ... I think that the gradual erosion of the consensus that's held our country together is probably more serious than a few bearded terrorists who fly into buildings."


This goes out to you Pat, courtesy of the band Cake.

Ok
All right
Oh no
This one, this one, this one

Heads of state who ride and wrangle
Who look at your face for more than one angle
Can cut you from their bloated budgets
Like sharpened knives through chicken mcnuggets

Now, heads of state who ride and wrangle
Who look at your face for more than one angle
Can cut you from their bloated budgets
Like sharpened knives through chicken mcnuggets

(Shut the f***) up
Yo, shut the f*** up
(Shut the f***)
Right, right, learn to buck up
(Shut the f***)
Right, shut the f*** up, hey, ho
(Shut the f***)
Now, now learn to buck up

(1, 2, a-1, 2, 3, 4!)

Now, nimble fingers that dance hall numbers
Will eat your children and steal your thunder
While heavy torsos that heave and hurl
Will crunch like nuts in the mouths of squirrels

Now, nimble fingers that dance hall numbers
Will eat your children and steal your thunder
While heavy torsos that heave and hurl
Will crunch like nuts in the mouths of squirrels

(Shut the f***) up
Yo, shut the f*** up
(Shut the f***)
Right now learn to buck up
(Shut the f***)
Right, shut the f*** up yeah, ho! Yow!
(Shut the f***) Yow! Yow! Yow!
Learn to buck up

Now, simple feet that flicker like fire
And burn like candles in smokey's fires
Do more to turn my joy to sadness
Than somber thoughts of burning planets

Now, clever feet that flicker like fire
And burn like candles in smokey's fires
Do more to turn my joy to sadness
Than somber thoughts of burning planets

(Shut the f***)
All right
Ok
I don't(Shut the f***) wanna
I don't wanna hear it that's right
(Shut the f***)
Oh no, ok, I don't wanna
(Shut the f***)
I don't wanna
(Shut the f***)
Yeeaahh, ho, yow!
(Shut the f***)
I don't wanna...I don't wanna...

Ooooh ooh oooooooh ooh ooooooohhh ooh






Sunday, May 01, 2005

Bums at a Ballpark

Yesterday, in a third hour segment of the NARN show, we were discussing American skanks with Mike Nelson. The conversation went pretty far a field, but I must say that I think we covered most of the bases in the very rich subject matter. While talking about how our leading skanks influence the clothing choices that young women make, we asked how parents could let their kids leave home in some of the skank fashion outfits that are so popular these days. Mike mentioned that his Dad used the phrase "Looking like bums at a ballpark" to describe the way he and his brothers would sometimes appear as they headed off to school.

This lead us (or at least me) to ponder the origin of the phrase. King said that it was because bums often attended day baseball games in the "good ol' days" as a way to pass the time and that tickets were often as little as fifty cents. Saint Paul chimed in and mentioned the infamous "Bleacher Bums" of Wrigley field and even recalled that a Cub manager had once publicly excoriated these fans for not having jobs after a day of them lustful booing the pathetic Cubs.

This of course lead to a quest to find out more about said incident, and, after a few minutes of Googling, Saint Paul had the goods on Cubs manager, Lee Elia and his notorious 1983 outburst to the media:

Cubs manager Lee Elia erupted in late April, 1983, during a press conference after another early-season loss. The rant mostly consists of dozens of F-bombs strung together. Here's a sample:

Lee Elia: F--- those BLEEP'n fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you rippin' every BLEEP'n thing you do. I'll tell you one BLEEP'n thing, I hope we get BLEEP'n hotter than BLEEP, just to stuff it up them 3,000 BLEEP'n people that show up every BLEEP'n day, because if they're the real Chicago BLEEP'n fans, they can kiss my BLEEP'n BEEP right downtown and PRINT IT. ... All right, they don't show because we're 5-14... and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb 15 BLEEP'n percent that come out to day baseball. The other 85 percent are earning a living.


But just knowing what Elia said wasn't enough. We wanted to hear it for ourselves. And now you can too. Be warned however that to call this clip "profanity filled" is a gross understatement. It's probably easier to count the non-profane words. But it is funny and well worth a listen.

Go here for a link to the audio.

Whew. The amazing thing is that Elia actually kept his job after weaving this tapestry of profanity that still probably hangs over the Windy City to this day:

Contrary to popular belief, Elia was not fired shortly after the incident. He held on long enough to post a 54-69 record that season before getting run. He only earned one more managing gig, going 111-142 with Philadelphia from 1987-88.





Bang! Bang! Make the Froggies Go Bang!

Toads are exploding in Germany. They have been for quite some time now leaving the ubiquitous "experts" a little bit befuddled and very much bemused.

This somewhat gruesome phenomenon has also left these experts characteristically bewitched by the endless quest to find the inconvenience of man's presense on this earth somehow responsible.

Environmentalists have been summoned, pond water has been tested, and human activity has been vilified...but no one has asked the crows:
...(A) German scientist studying the splattered amphibian remains now has a theory: Hungry crows may be pecking out their livers.

"The crows are clever," said Frank Mutschmann, a Berlin veterinarian who collected and tested specimens at the Hamburg pond. "They learn quickly from watching other crows how to get the livers."

Based on the wounds, Mutschmann said, it appears that a bird pecks into the toad with its beak between the amphibian's chest and abdominal cavity, and the toad puffs itself up as a natural defense mechanism.

But, because the liver is missing and there's a hole in the toad's body, the blood vessels and lungs burst and the other organs ooze out, he said.
I've had my run-ins with birds in the past...but this kind of nonsense crosses the line.

Toads are dying daily at the beaks of their uncaring avian oppressors. We can no longer sit in silence while countless batrachians perish as birds literally feast on their vital organs! We must rise up and put an end to the pestilent scourge that is ravaging our planet!!

Fight the power, my friends. Fight the power!

(Hat tip to Mark...I'm no bird fan either)





TALK O' THE TOWN
We are the wind beneath the right wing.

Listen to the Northern Alliance Radio Network on Saturdays from 11am 'til 3pm on AM 1280-The Patriot:

* The First Team 11am-1pm
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Podcast Archives

This week on The First Team:

Brian bravely seeks to uncover the secrets of the Bikini Ice Fishing Team as he broadcasts live from the 2010 MN Sportsmen's Show in St. Paul.



The truth behind StarCaps

INTERVIEW ARCHIVE


2009-10 NARN LOON O' THE WEEK

1/9--Mike Malloy
12/19--Al Gore
12/12--Harry Reid
11/21--Al Gore
11/14--Nancy Synderman
11/7--Roland Burris
10/31--Levi Johnston
10/24--Alan Grayson
10/17--Rick Sanchez
10/10--Barbara Boxer
9/26--Ed Schultz
9/19--Jimmy Carter
9/5--Chris Matthews
8/29--Dan Savage
8/22--Brad Pitt
8/15--Chris Matthews
8/8--Barbara Boxer
8/1--Bill Maher
7/11--Maddow/Klobuchar
7/4--Al Franken
6/13--David Letterman
6/6--Harry Reid
5/30--Drew Barrymore
5/23--Jesse Ventura
5/16--Wanda Sykes
5/9--Alren Specter
5/2--Nancy Pelosi
4/25--Janeane Garofalo
4/4--Damon Greene
3/28--Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva
3/21--Charles Grassley
3/14--Seymour Hersh
3/7--DL Hughley
2/28--Sean Penn
2/21--James Clyburn
2/14--Chuck Schumer
2/7--Nancy Pelosi
1/31--Nancy Pelosi
1/24--Richard Lugar
1/10--PETA
1/3--Caroline Kennedy


2008 Loons of the Week

2007 Loons of the Week

2006 Loons of the Week


the don of design

GOOD DEEDS
Adopt a soldier


Compassion

Misericordia Orphanage

MN Patriot Guard

Soldiers' Angels

Spirit of America

Tee It Up For The Troops

World Vision


 




TRIVIAL PURSUITS


Keegan's Irish Pub Thursdays at 8pm



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