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Tuesday, November 13, 2007
No There There

After catching a whiff of the noxious gas (two parts paranoia with one part delusion) wafting from the fetid fringe of the local fever swamps, I felt like William Shatner in that notable SNL sketch at the Trekkie convention:

GET A LIFE, will you people? I mean, for crying out loud, it's just a blog! I mean, look at you, look at the way you're dressed! You've turned an enjoyable little group, that we set up as a lark for a few years, into a COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME!

I mean, how old are you people? What have you done with yourselves?
You, you must be almost 60... have you ever kissed anyone?

I didn't think so! There's a whole world out there! So... move out of your parent's basements! And get your own apartments and GROW THE HELL UP! I mean, it's just a blog dammit, IT'S JUST A BLOG!


For the sake of clarification, the Minnesota Organization of Bloggers (MOB) is not a vast conspiracy to impose a neo-conservative theocracy and turn Minnesota into Alabama circa 1923. The MOB is nothing more than an extremely loosely knit grouping of local bloggers. If you're looking for an organization structure with lines connecting the bosses, capos, and crew you won't find one here. There are no "ties that bind" because there are no ties at all.

Joining the MOB is about as significant as joining the Hannah Montana Fan Club. And it's cheaper and easier. There are three simple requirements:

1. You blog in Minnesota or have a very strong Minnesota connection

2. You not be an obsessive stalker

3. You know how to spell ridiculous (special dispensation was granted to Andy)

That's it. There's nothing more to it than that. If you insist on pretending that there is, I offer three pieces of advice:

1. Get some perspective

2. Get a sense of humor

3. Get a frickin' life

All that being said, it is interesting to note that all of this controversy and resulting intracine bickering and arguing has taken place under King Banaian's mayoral watch. After waiting several days to react (he was rumored to be clearing brush at his Stearns County ranch style house), he finally offered this tepid response. Not exactly the bold leadership that one would expect in such a crisis. I expect that this bumper sticker will soon become quite popular.

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